My wife, of 4 years and I are Christian protestants. We currently attend a non-denominational church. I’m currently in the RCIA process at the inquiry phase. I have fallen deeply in love with the catholic faith. I love it all. I have asked her to attend Mass with me, but she’s reluctant to do that as of yet. After my confirmation to the Catholic Church I would like to continue to attend it with her. The major problem I’m having is my wife is not interested in Catholicism. She supports my decision but believes it’s not for her. How can I present the faith to her that attracts her as well?
I am in a similar position as you. What has made my wife receptive is the idea of raising our children in the traditions of Catholicism. It helps that my entire extended family is Catholic. She observes them and appreciates the various traditions and how it seems to offer a good spiritual foundation, whereas in Protestantism (evangelical) it is less structured and deemphasized.
I'd suggest you get the video and study guide "Common Ground" from www.catholicprotestant.com
After that, try Steve Ray's "Footprints of God" DVDs.
If she will read some things you might try “Born Fundamentalist Born Again Catholic” by David Currie and “Home Sweet Rome” by Scott Hahn both of those are good beginner books. The website, www.catholicbridge.com is very help as well for Protestants looking to do away with common misconceptions. A lot of the time the reason protestants aren’t interested, especially evangelicals, is because they have been mislead most of their life. They may say it’s ok now for their kids etc… but somewhere harbor some anti-Catholicism wheither they know it or not.
[quote="BlackJack774, post:1, topic:177994"]
My wife, of 4 years and I are Christian protestants. We currently attend a non-denominational church. I’m currently in the RCIA process at the inquiry phase. I have fallen deeply in love with the catholic faith. I love it all. I have asked her to attend Mass with me, but she’s reluctant to do that as of yet. After my confirmation to the Catholic Church I would like to continue to attend it with her. The major problem I’m having is my wife is not interested in Catholicism. She supports my decision but believes it’s not for her. How can I present the faith to her that attracts her as well? :confused:
You live it well in front of her. You love her well as God commands you to do. You share moments and thoughts with her and answer any questions she has. Be a good example of a Catholic and leave the conversion to the Holy Spirit.
You live it well in front of her. You love her well as God commands you to do. You share moments and thoughts with her and answer any questions she has. Be a good example of a Catholic and leave the conversion to the Holy Spirit
yup. *** that's*** the answer! party on, Seatuck!!!!!!!!
Thank you: Seatuck, jwashu, kage_ar, BPW75 for your help. And dido monicatholic! I hope and pray that being that good example of a Catholic (which I’m still learning) and with the help of the Holy Sprit my wife will come to see the Catholic faith as I have. The one, holy, universal and apostolic church.:thumbsup:
Why not just let her be. Its selfish to convert her just because you love catholicism. If she wants to change she wants to change, if she doesnt why not respect her choice.
I came here to say the same things as others have said. You can't force anything on her. Just lead by example and arm yourself with knowledge as she will have questions.
I went through this with my DH years ago. We were married in the CC. He'd come to Mass with me occasionally which would always end up discussions regarding the Church - practices, rituals, traditions etc. 8 years into our marriage he shocked me when he signed up for RCIA classes.
I prayed lot too!
Use this time to become the most devoted and attentive husband you possibly can. Scott Hahn recounted an incident in one of his books (forget which) when a friend advised him to LAY OFF the apologetics with his wife and TURN ON the romance instead. That was really the ticket.
Bring her flowers. Wash the dishes. Compliment her when she's put some effort into her dress or hair. Be tuned in to the stresses and demands of her life, and see if there's some little way you can lighten the load, whether that means a shoulder rub or just getting her a cold one from the fridge. :) If your wife sees that your love of the Catholic faith is only increasing and making your love for her more generous and fruitful, it will be a much more powerful testimony than any books you can read or deep theological discussions you can have. Those may all come in time, too, but right now, she just needs to know through your deeds that your new-found faith is strengthening your marriage (and turning out to be a pretty good deal for her as well!)
I second reading Scott Hahn’s “Rome Sweet Home”. I love the book and only not for the conversion story but for the truth they share about their relationship. I think anyone can read about the struggles Scott and Kimberly had when he converted and gain an understanding of what it means when one converts. They were honest about the struggles and feelings within the marriage.
My dad was the Catholic one in the relationship and my step mom said she would never convert. He didn’t push the faith on her but lived by the “Preach the Gospel and if necessary use words”. He showed his catholic faith and that why she converted 8 years later.
Just work on being the best husband you can to her. Love her as Christ loves the church.
Thanks you all so much for your support and prayers. My wife seems to be more and more open to catholicism. If we could have found a baby sitter I believe she would have attend midnight mass, her first mass with me, on christmas eve.
But I suffered a very confusing blow. I revealed to my parents during a resent visit home my new expansion and fulfillment of my christian faith through the catholic church. Well that didn’t go over well at all. My mother thought I was confused and miss interrupting God messages, and my father thought I would rune my marriage. This was very heart breaking to say the least. I didn’t know what to say to this. So I just stayed quiet. I love and respect my parents, but they haven’t changed my mind about converting. But it’s really hard not having my parents support in this. I believe I will be the first and only catholic in my family. How do you present the faith to skeptical parents?
Your parents need time to absorb your conversion, they probably never saw it coming and are in a bit of a shock. It’s good news about your wife however! Have you discussed praying the rosary in your RCIA class yet? The begining of a new year is a good time to start praying a rosary every day for the conversion (and understanding) of your wife and relatives. P. S. If you are going to receive the sacrements at the Easter Vigil 2010, be sure to line up babysitting early. The Liturgy is AWESOME and you will not want your wife to miss it!!
My wife recently asked me this, "What do Catholics think Protestants are doing?" And I think she's leading into another questions (which she didn't ask yet) "Do Catholics thinks Protestants are wrong?" I don't want to answer this wrong. So what do you all think?
[quote="BlackJack774, post:1, topic:177994"]
She supports my decision but believes it’s not for her. How can I present the faith to her that attracts her as well?
the best way will be to change the way you live due to your new commitment, as you grow in the faith. that will convince her of the truth and rightness of your choice better than anything else.
What do Catholics think Protestants are doing?
most catholics think most protestants are goodwill people trying to follow the Lord as best as they can.
then ask her if she has specifics in mind.
you always get to hold off on response like you did today-- in order to make sure your answer and delivery are good.
Great news!!! My wife has agreed to attend mass with me!!!!:)
This pass Sunday was the Rite of Welcome for new candidates for the RCIA process at my parish and it was amazing, beautiful, and very touching. The catholic faith is so beautiful! Later that night my wife told me that she is open to going to mass with me!!! Thank God! :thumbsup:
Thanks again for all your prayers.
That’s fabulous news… take things slowly and peacefully… God will do the rest!
Talking with my wife on Easter, and excellent question came up, "Does the Holy Spirit move in the protestant denominations?"
We were talking that morning about the Church, the teaching authority of the Church and the reformations. I was telling her how the Roman Catholic Church has the teaching Magisterial guided by the Holy Spirit that declares "Thus says the Lord." And well to that my wife asked, "The Holy Spirit doesn't speak to protestants helping to guild them?" I said yes Matt. 18:20 says, "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them." But there are MANY examples of conflicting and contradictory doctrines among Protestant denominations. For example, one Protestant denomination baptizes infants while another teaches that this is not biblical. Clearly, they cannot both be led by the Spirit infallibly since one of them must be wrong. Yet, they both claim to be “approved workmen” following the Bible Alone.
I think the Church's teaching Magisterial guided by the Holy Spirit has help the Church avoid such faith and moral doctrinal pit falls.