How do we solve this NFP conundrum?

I recently had my third baby shortly after having my second (they’re fifteen months apart). The closeness was due to my husband’s insistence that we be open to life and not worry about being strict with NFP and that all things will work out, etc.
I’m overwhelmed. I have few friends, no immediate support aside from him and haven’t been away from children since early February except for quick trips for groceries and diapers when he’s watched the three kids. I have slipped into absurd depression that I can’t seem to resurface from and he’s starting to pressure me again.
I am not open to life. I cannot see even considering the possibility of another child at the moment. Maybe in a couple years, but not now.
He is not open to abstinence and thinks we should rely on God and His judgement over how many kids we get and when.
How do we solve this conundrum? Should I just be obedient to my husband?

Dear friend,

The Catholic Church recognizes many good reasons for spacing the conception of children which are not selfish and sinful. Your reason ranks at the top of the list. “Good News About Sex and Marriage” (which you can order through shop.catholic.com) by Christopher West says on p. 112: “But spouses who mutually agree to abstain from intercourse because they have JUST reason to avoid pregnancy are acting out of love and utter fidelity to their wedding vows”

On pp. 116-117 he writes further:

“The Church readily recognizes, especially in our day and age, that many couples DO have good reason not to receive children as they come to certain times of the married life. The Second Vatican Council offers the following guidelines for spouses in planning their family size: ‘Spouses should thoughtfully take into account both their own welfare and that of their children, those already born, and those that the future may bring.” This is from “Gaudium et Spes,” n. 50

Show this to your husband and feel free to write me privately by clicking on my name above. You and your family are in my prayers.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.

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