How do you go about getting your marriage annulled?


#1

Can someone please explain to me how would I go about getting my marriage annulled.

To be totally honest I never thought about doing it before because I felt that I did not have grounds to get the marriage annulled. I was pregnant when we got married. There after so many other things happened physical and emotional abuse. He cheated on me twice that I was aware of and he left me for a much younger girl and got her pregnant while we were married.

Before we got married the priest asked us are we sure that this is what we want to do. He also asked were we forced to get married and we said no.

Here is South Africa you never hear of people annulling their marriages. I would not even know where to start.


#2

I would advise you to talk to the parish priest first (or perhaps another priest that you know). The diocese should have a marriage tribunal office to which this priest will be able to direct you. The tribunal office has staff who are well informed of the Canon Law regulations for annullments. Having spoken to them, you may be able to make a case for an annullment. I imagine it may be quite a long process - they will not grant annullments ‘lightly’ and you will have to show that your relationship was defective at the point of marriage. This is because an annullment is not a “Catholic divorce”, the purpose is to show that the marriage itself was invalid for some reason. Best wishes.


#3

Laugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh Alert*
:wink: Well here in the United States according to some, we go to our local Catholic book store, and pick one up off the revolving rack of Decrees of Nullity, all shrink-wrapped and ready to use. Then we fill out the form in black or blue ink, take it to the Internet site, register it using the special code number found in the package, and wait for the official stamp to come in the snail mail in 7-10 business days.:wink:
Laugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh AlertLaugh Alert*

Start with your parish priest. You might also look at your diocese or archdiocese web site. In fact, I shall head to the Internet and find you the web sites.

catholic-johannesburg.org.za/dept_tribunal/ (It says call the chancery and gives alink.)

catholic-ct.org.za/ (This is Cape Town, but it didn’t say much.)

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=35&Itemid=32

catholic-pe.co.za/marriage.htm
catholic-pe.co.za/links.htm

198.62.75.1/www1/gtl/eshowe/index.htm

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?option=com_joomlaboard&Itemid=96

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?searchword=tribunal&option=com_search&Itemid=5

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=32&Itemid=54

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=24&Itemid=46 (Dundee)

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=20&Itemid=30 (Durban)

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=15&Itemid=37 (Rustenberg)

sacbc.org.za/Site/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=12&Itemid=26 (Pretoria)


#4

familyministries.org/resources/article.asp?c_id=65&t_id=7&article_id=19

Here’s more information on annulments as well. But the best answer, is make an appointment and talk to your parish priest for guidance. God bless you on this choice.


#5

There is no such thing as “getting your marriage annulled.” Either complete consent was given by both parties, or it was not. You are asking the tribunal to determine whether or not that actually happened. If the tribunal determines that it did not happen, it will issue a “decree of nullity.”

Mere semantics? No, precision.


#6

Thank you all for your assistance.

Thanx OutinChgoburbs I live in Johannesburg so the Cathedral is near my place of work so I will make an appointment with the priest there.


#7

While it is true that a decree of nullity is a possible outcome from a tribunal’s examination of a marriage, around here at CAF we try to be charitable and kind to everybody, even in stating fact. While you may not have intended to deliver your message as strongly as you did, because you are limited by print, it does read as angry and rather condescending in tone.

Further, this has been previously explained on CAF, as CAF has been in operation since 2004.

I recommend to you two of our resident canonists, cameron_lansing and John Lilburne. They give us all many corrections and facts without taking condescending tone, and are kind in their instruction.


#8

OutinChgoburbs I am angry and very angry. I did not mean to come across as been as (angry and rather condescending in tone). I just feel that is so unfair. I never asked for all this I never asked for my ex to up and leave me one day after 13 years of marriage.

I thought I was going to be married forever. I have tolerated so much from my ex. The physical abuse, emotional abuse, cheating, lying and deceiving. And still at the end of the day I am the one who is suffering. My ex is happy with his now 21 year old girlfriend and their two year old son. That he is so proud to show off to his family. He talks to everybody about his 2 year old son instead of about his 7 year old beautiful, clever and intellengent daughter or about his 10 year old handson, clever son. I am the one who cannot go receive communion. I am the one who cannot date or want to be with any man.

I am sorry and I did not mean to be condescending. And I don’t mean to be so angry or feel sorry for myself. But at the end of the day I am the one who was abused for many years and told how fat I am and how no man would ever want me. I was the one who was beating up so many times and still loved my husband and stayed married to him. I was the one who arranged to go to Retrouvaille but after going away on the weekend and followup sessions and on the last day was told that he was not going to give up porn or improve his ways. And still I stayed in the marriage even when there was other women I still stayed.

And now I just want to forget that I was ever married to that man. He cannot acknowledge or support his kids. He made it very clear to me that the only reason why he married me was because I was pregnant and he was forced to. But that was not true nobody forced him and he made me feel all those years that he could do better than me.


#9

Sister in Christ - why would you not be able to recieve Communion? Even if you are in mortal sin, you can go to Confesssion and be reconcilled.


#10

No no Robaynne- not you Sweetie!!! You are fine. :hug3:

I was talking about the guy who came in and got technical on the term “annulment”!!! That was just wrong.


I PMd you more info.


You really need to go talk to somebody at the cathedral soon, because if you are not remarried, you can indeed go to Holy Communion!!!


#11

I am new to the forum, so I apologize if there are answers out there already to my question. I was divorced 2 years ago, and was never married in the catholic church so I was unaware I needed to have my marriage annulled. They are requesting that I produce copies of my baptism and confirmation certificates, which I do not have. My parents are both deceased, and I know my father had them at one point but it is never to be found now. I have contacted my parish where I had both done and they do not have record of me. What do I do now? I am in a pretty serious relationship of more than a year, and I know that at some point we would like to marry in the catholic church but unless I have this taken care of we won’t be able to.
Please help!:confused:


#12

A recent copy of your certificate of baptism will show that you have no Catholic marriage so you have to try to find the parish where your baptism was registered. Are you sure that you were baptized where you think? Are your godparents still alive? They should be able to attest to your baptism if for some reason it wasn’t recorded.


#13

I was issued a decree of nullity after sending in about 10 pages of information. The Tribunal determined that we didn’t give our full consent. My ex-husband admitted to me after being married to him in an almost loveless marriage for 12 years that his dad had talked him into marrying him telling him that it would be good for him. He was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder and then divorced me a year later. After many years and lots of research, I do believe he had demons who attached to him. He invited them in unknowingly by being involved with Zen ideas and then with channelling,etc. He never threatened me, but I saw bizarre things at times. There had to be things going on that I didn’t see also.


#14

The very fact you were pregnant when you got married can detract from the “free consent” you need for the vows to be valid.

There is often an implied force to “shotgun weddings.” Your ex’s incapacity to treat you like a human being, his constant infidelity and his abandonment indicate he probably did not intend from the beginning for the marriage to be exclusive or indissoluble.

Right there, three huge strikes against any idea that your marriage vows were valid.

Good luck! And just because you are divorced doesn’t mean you can’t receive communion! It’s only those who divorce and remarry outside the church who can’t.

:thumbsup:


#15

To the poster who can’t find her sacramental certificates, if you locate your birth certificate it will have annotated on it all other sacraments you received. If your parents were military, you may have done it through that archdiocese. If so let me know. It’s easy to get your certificate from them!

Sometimes if you go through old pictures you can get a clue what city, state, or diocese you were baptized in. From old addresses you can guess what church it would have been.

Grandparents, aunts, uncles… old friends of your parents may have that information too.

Good luck!

I am sure the Church has a remedy for non-existent paperwork. In this pilgrim church we are in, we have so many people who came from countries where churches were torched and where wars eliminated records. I’m sure there is a way around it.


#16

(This is an old thread)


#17

Good catch. I really don’t look at the dates when one is bumped up to the top. This is the second time recently that a newbie has brought an old thread back rather than start a new one.

But now I"m wondering if they ever got their annulments or found their baptismal certificates.


#18

I was wondering about that too, since the OP was a regular poster here. I don’t remember an update.


#19

:thumbsup:

I was about to post the same thing. The Catholic Church does not annul marriages. All it does is discerns whether a marriage actually existed, or not.


#20

Well…it may, or it may not. When I needed to get my marriage annulled, I got a recent baptismal certificate, & it had nothing else on it. Some priests are great record keepers, some are awful! Anyway, I had to go to the church where I was confirmed & get a certificate from them, as well.


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