How does one practice humility?

How does one practice humility? How can i become a nicer, more loving caring person?? I see the word humility everywhere and even when Mary practiced humility as she tended to her cousins needs. I feel like a genuine nice open person now, but i want to be MORE. I want to be so full of kindness and love and spread that to other people, but how??? I know that i could easily buy things for people, or treat people to lunch , or do nice things, but i feel like those things are forced or fake. I want to be able to do it naturally, coming from within. Thank you all and God bless! :love:

Humility is an attitude, it is recognizing
whom you SERVE, not self, but the Lord!
“Truly, I am Your servant,
I am Your servant, the son
of your handmaid, You have
loosed my bonds” Ps. 116:16

Oh, humility. I have such a long standing love-hate relationship with this virtue. I used to say, “Ask for humility, and you will be humiliated!” I used to pray, “Lord, I don’t need more instances to practice humility! Just help in practicing it!” As the wife of a mentally ill and verbally abusive husband, I have deeply struggled to grapple the concept of humility and when to pair it with self-defense. When to anchor my tongue and when to allow words to leave my lips. I still strive and aim for humility, but through the grace of the Holy Spirit I have had a little bit of clarity on the issue. Humility is something that comes through practice, and practice alone. We have opportunity after opportunity to practice it, but the virtue does not increase itself. Our hearts are coded to love and show love, but it is also from our hearts that darkness comes. Just think of the readings from this Sunday! It is through practice and practice alone that we can allow God’s nature to be our reaction to life instead of our nature dictating it. Smiling at others, genuinely caring about the answer when we ask “how are you today?”, stopping to help someone with doors or if they are carrying too much, these are very easy things that can become regular practices in our life. It becomes second nature. And it builds upon itself, allowing you to see more as Christ sees and to love more as Christ loves. The ultimate test of humility and love, in my opinion, is to be able to continue to pour yourself out even when you are being rejected, insulted or hurt. So while it is easy for me to lament about my husband’s propensity for lashing at me verbally and emotionally, I try to look at our situation through Christ’s eyes and with Christ’s love. This is how I try to practice humility in my own life.

…That was a long response. My apologies. :slight_smile:

I meditate on the Litany of Humility daily:
ewtn.com/Devotionals/prayers/humility.htm

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,
Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being loved…
From the desire of being extolled …
From the desire of being honored …
From the desire of being praised …
From the desire of being preferred to others…
From the desire of being consulted …
From the desire of being approved …
From the fear of being humiliated …
From the fear of being despised…
From the fear of suffering rebukes …
From the fear of being calumniated …
From the fear of being forgotten …
From the fear of being ridiculed …
From the fear of being wronged …
From the fear of being suspected …

That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I …
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should…

Calls for radical conversion of heart. Reorienting one’s deepest desires.
Also Sirach 3:

17My son, conduct your affairs with humility,
and you will be loved more than a giver of gifts.
18Humble yourself the more, the greater you are,
and you will find mercy in the sight of God.† f
20For great is the power of the Lord;
by the humble he is glorified.
21What is too sublime for you, do not seek;
do not reach into things that are hidden from you.g
22What is committed to you, pay heed to;
what is hidden is not your concern.
23In matters that are beyond you do not meddle,
when you have been shown more than you can understand.
24Indeed, many are the conceits of human beings;
evil imaginations lead them astray.

Pride is a huge problem for me and I am also trying to learn humility.

As per another person’s post here, I have begun praying daily the Litany of Humility.

I am also asking daily for the graces I need to grow in my faith, including humility- especially humility.

I have founds some of my best opportunities to practice humility are in the confessional (having to confess my sins, especially those of pride, is embarrassing and helps me learn humility)- and I try to confess weekly or every two weeks so I get to practice this often. Driving appears to be another one- instead of being angry when someone cuts me off or drives 15 miles under the speed limit, I try to be patient and recognize that I am not more important than them. My office is another place I have to practice humility but it’s also the place I fail most at.

I’ve begun going to once-weekly Adoration and that seems to be helping. Not directly but rather indirectly, as though perhaps the Lord is having extra mercy on me and helping me by granting me the graces I need to improve in this area- although admittedly I have a ways to go.

A good read is Humilty of Heart by Cajetan Bergamo

The Twelve Steps of Humility and Pride by St Bernard of Clairvaux is a classic work.

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