How does the Church view non-sexual romantic feelings toward same-sex?


#1

I just finished reading the piece on this website regarding the Church's teachings on homosexuality. I understand the theology and I believe that the arguments are made logically and have theological basis. There is something that I would like clarified however. In paragraph that answered the argument about homosexuals being born homosexual, it made the counter-argument that homosexual urges being involuntary did not condone acting upon them and it drew a comparison to alcoholism. I can understand that argument as it pertains to physical urges. What I think the argument did not answer is a homosexual's romantic feelings toward someone of the same sex. Understanding that romanticism is an intagible concept, how does the Church account for someone having non-sexual, but romantic feelings toward a person of the same sex? I am engaged and throughout the day will see my fiance and find myself completely smitten with her and craving her affection. Plenty of times that I experience that sensation there is no sexual connotation associated with that. It is like what people describe as "butterflies in their stomach". So what happens when a man feels the same romanticism toward another man? Are the uncontrolable non-sexual feelings of romanticism toward a member of the same sex categorized similarly to physical attraction. My initial feeling is that they are not. Romantic feelings I think are more driven out of admiration for the other person. So I have a hard time understanding how that is the precursor to the abomination that homosexual sex is considered to be. Hopefully I articulated my thoughts well enough.


#2

Dear friend,

Assuming that you admire him, why do you not have romantic feelings about your father? Whether you are aware of it or not, your romantic feelings are about a person that you can have sexual feelings about. If you are heterosexually inclined, you would not have such feelings for members of your own sex. There is a definite connection between romance and sexuality, even when one isn’t conscious of it.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.


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