How long did it take for God to bring you a spouse?

I have been praying and praying for God to bless with a spouse. Ever since I was 5 years old I knew I wanted to be married. However I have terrible shyness and have praying for God to give me the courage to find a wife or more ideally my wife to find me! It would be amazing and truly a blessing if a extroverted woman wanted me to be her husband. I feel like I would compliment her well. Either way I know I am to be married and I just want to be with my wife already lol. I was just curious how long it took you all praying and seeking marriage to find a spouse.

Hmm; well, I married at age 30 which is kind of late, but it wasn’t God’s intervention so much as the intervention of an interested matchmaker. Ask your friends to alert you to potential matches, and follow up on those possibilities.


Unfortunately I do not have any friends now except Jesus lol. But I am hoping my wife will be my friend.

I agree; spouses must first be friends.

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I’m not sure when you got married, but 30 is certainly not late anymore…not in contemporary Western society. I’m pretty sure the average marrying age is 30ish/early 30s in my region.

OP - I was 27 when I got married. I only dated one or two women before my wife…but I had a number of women friends. Mileage will vary. Be patient.


I hope that this trend of late marriage reverses itself. I don’t want to be attending a lot of middle age marriages where the biological clock has run out.

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Well, you need to have a way to meet friends.You can pray, but God is not going to just drop a woman on your doorstep. You need to get out and get used to talking to people.


32 years, and counting!


40 and still waiting…trying though with Have you considered using that site? It can probably help with your shyness.


I was married at 26 and DH and I were the youngest couple at pre Cana


As I said above, I was married at 27… now 33 and father of a 5 year old…I always feel like a young dad around these parts. My two business partners are both in their 40s and have young kids around the same age group as mine. Getting married older and having kids later is definitely the trend. My mom was 19 when she got married and 20 when she had me…that’s basically scandalous now.

I’m praying for a girlfriend and hopefully, God will give me that girl at the right time! Try to make friends and don’t be shy about that! There’s you can try to use Catholic Connect if I’m not mistaken. The people who are there are in touch with Jesus. You could have a strong relationship because you have Jesus as a friend and mediator. Pray for that ideal woman, God will give her at the right time!

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Yes I must be patient. It just hard because I know every day I am not with my future spouse is one less day I will have with her.

It is hard because I am shy. I certainly would love if a girl came to my doorstep lol. But hopefully an extroverted girl will like me because it is hard for me to make friends.

Have you considered counseling to help with your shyness? Not that there’s anything wrong with being shy if it’s not bothering you… but it DOES seem to be bothering you & interfering with what you want for your life. Find a therapist who can help you take baby steps out of your shell! I’m sure a therapist would love to help you with that. You’re already motivated & just need perhaps a gentle nudge from someone whose in your corner, so to speak!

As to an extroverted wife - don’t assume she’ll want to be in charge of all the socializing and will “let you off the hook” so to speak. We can’t marry to have someone else compensate for our weaknesses. Chances are she’ll stretch you a bit. :wink: Not a bad thing - don’t get me wrong. But perhaps a bit less idyllic than you seem to imagine.

In any event, I recommend Catholic Match or a similar Catholic site where you can get to know someone for awhile before the face to face meeting where your shyness perhaps will be less if you already feel you know the lady a bit. Best of luck!!


If I had followed inspiration, I would have met my husband of 30 years a couple of years sooner. I was at my alma mater, and after prayer, I heard the name of another college in another state.

I ended up in that state after graduation. I prayed to know where to find my spouse, and I heard within that I should go to my aunt’s house. As it turned out, my aunt was up the hill from my future in-laws’ by about a half mile. My sons and I would sometimes walk up to see my aunt and play pool when we were visiting my MIL.

My new congregation:

My particular ministry promoting the cloisters and contemplative life:
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41 here and still waiting. Actually, that’s a bit of an overstatement. I’ve given up and accepted it’s not going to happen so I guess I’m not really waiting anymore.

Exactly. It’s no good sitting around at home and waiting for it to happen. You have to get out there and do some looking around.


35 years. I was married once before at 23, but I don’t think she was sent by God. If she was, God has got a twisted sense of humor. Fortunately he made up for it the second time around.


An engineer and a scientist, (both men) were at a party. They were off to the side by themselves, leaning against the wall and complaining about how they’re unable to meet eligible women to date.

Then they heard a voice from above say, “I’m sick and tired of hearing you complain about how there are no women for you to meet. I’m going to put the woman of your dreams across the room from you. The only condition is that you can only cross the room halfway.
“Then you can cross half the remaining distance, then half of the remaining distance. And so on.”

Poof! There she was.

The engineer started walking across the room. The scientist grabbed his arm and lamented, “Don’t you see the cruel irony of this?! If we cross half the distance, and half the distance, and half again, we’ll never get to her!”

The engineer pulled away and said, “I’ll get close enough.”

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