As promised, here is my response.
This is my final word on the matter because, firstly, I want to bow out of this thread, and, secondly, because while domestic violence is relevant, it shouldn’t derail the thread.
We seem to be talking at cross-purposes. I’m mainly talking about the depiction of domestic violence which we get in the media and from government. Here, my perspective is very much Australian. I suspect that we get more “propaganda” here than you do (assuming that you are American). You seem to be talking more about the reality - which is probably more similar in both countries. Whether the reality meets the depiction is a difficult issue, and is likely to be different in both countries. In Australia, at least, it’s an utter fiction, and a feminist lie. There’s also the law, particularly in relation to separation, which does seem to be different.
Answering your questions/points, as I understand them.
The problem is ubiquitous in that it touches everyone’s life at some point; it could be a family member, friend, co-worker.
That’s not the propaganda we get here. The propaganda is that violence against women is in “epidemic” proportions and that all men and boys are in some sense the problem. That traditional “masculinity” is the main cause of domestic violence, and that men and boys need to be re-educated. This comes from the multi-billion dollar domestic violence industry, at the taxpayer’s expence.
Well, if it is abusive…it is abusive. Abuse isn’t just physical and to dismiss other types of abuse will allow mistreatment of women, men and children to perpetuate.
Thanks for acknowledging that abuse of men exists.
Some “anger” and “coercive behaviour”, as mentioned in my original post, is going to happen at times in most relationships, from both sides. The problem I mentioned is that when it’s the husband doing it to the wife (in a normal relationship), she is able to label it as “domestic violence”, which has now become a societal taboo and this is very empowering for her. Husbands are trapped, unable to express their feelings or resist a domineering wife, lest they be labelled as “abusers”. I’m talking about normal relationships here, not those with persistent abuse by the husband. I’ve seen wives do exactly that, and experienced it myself.
As far as leaving: It takes an average 7 times for a victim/survivor to leave an abusive relationship.
Again, I’m not talking about relationships where there is a persistent pattern of serious abuse - I’m talking about the infiltration of domestic violence propaganda into normal relationships.