With two little ones and a situation you can’t change, you have all the more reason to talk to a priest. Maybe, as @Tis_Bearself said, “pick one with a few years’ experience.” The priest could help you figure out how to sort things out for the good of your family and yourself.
Maybe you’ve heard of Amoris Laetitia, a recent Church teaching about families. I haven’t read it myself, not yet, but I’ve read that it discusses what you call “irregular” situations where children are involved. A priest who is familiar with it could be a great help to you.
Do not be concerned that Amoris Laetitia has been criticized by some well-meaning Catholics who fear that it threatens to change Church doctrine. It is really meant to help families and parents to stay in the Church, or return to the Church, and to be as good and holy as they can be in their circumstances.
Don’t try to read it and apply it by yourself. You really need guidance on this. See the priest!
Let us pray: May the Holy Spirit continue to assist and guide you always toward faith, hope, and love.