How to deal with scrupulosity when....?


#1

How do I deal with it when I’m afraid to trust even my confessor and my anxiety makes me think about certain things all day long, exhausting me. It’s easy to just say obey your confessor but this to me is not as easy as it sounds. Right now, I’ve been worrying whether or not buying from companies that test on animals is a sin and other things. I can’t stop thinking about it.

I’m exhausted and I can’t seem to do anything else besides think about this. I am always like this. I am fine for a few weeks even months, thinking I’ll never suffer from it again and then it hits me again really bad like right now.

Please try to understand my situation before putting very rude comments that help no one. I know I should trust my confessor and get help. I have done that but it never made my scrupulosity disappear.
Also, I ask for your prayers.


#2

Why?

Have you looked into getting a new confessor then?


#3

I’d be wary of giving the scrupulous this advice, lest they go on the usual crazy roundabout of confessors, trusting none and disregarding all. After all, Catholicism was not built to be a theme park! :roller_coaster::carousel_horse::ferris_wheel:


#4

True, but trust with a confessor/SD is key…


#5

If you are so doubtful and anxious that you cannot even trust your confessor who is there to help you, I suspect that you need medical help first and foremost. Seek that. If I were in your place, it would be my priority.

Praying for you. God bless.


#6

If he can’t trust a confessor he hasn’t stated any issues with, I’d doubt he’ll trust another. Especially since that one will be new and he will not be sure of his persuasions and the advice likely to be given. Just saying.


#7

Please seek medical help. This is something a doctor should be able to help you with.

I’m sorry you’re suffering. I hope you can find some peace soon.


#8

Then you have a problem. Trusting and obedience to a confessor is paramount and if you refuse to do this, I don’t see how else you can get better.

The only other thing I can tell you is to just receive Communion, because I’m willing to bet that if you are in real sin, it will be clear to you and scrupulosity will actually not flare up.

Oh, and buy whatever products you need. Act against your doubts.


#9

Are you familiar with


#10

I was very scrupulous in the past. Diagnosed OCD as well. I know what you are going through.

Listen… Obedience is all you have to overcome your scrupulousity. The Church does not have a official declaration on everything that our minds (us suffering with scrupulousity) can come up with. Let me try to explain…

The Church can tell us what constitutes Mortal sin. Grave matter, Full knowledge, full consent. There are gray areas in there. Not every priest can pinpoint exactly when something crosses the line from grave matter to Mortal Sin. We have to sometimes use our best judgement. The Church, at this time, does not provide a official guideline on how to apply the three conditions so that we know for sure exactly when we cross the line into mortal sin. It simply tells us to examine our conscience. The problem is with scrupulous people is that our conscience is sometimes out of whack. We sometimes cant differentiate between what is clearly not a mortal sin and what is even though most people can. We know the moral law. Sometimes better then most people. But we do not know how to apply it. THAT is the problem.

All The Church has to offer us, in terms of help, is the overwhelming agreement among priests, Bishops and The Saints of old, including St Alphonsus Ligouri who suffered greatly with scrupulosity, and various other theologians and teachers in The Church is this… The ONLY cure to scrupulosity and path to peace is OBEDIENCE to a spiritual director and confessor. That is it… that is the only solid advice The Church has to offer on Scrupulosity.

Your conscience is out of whack, much like a compass that cannot find true north. Imagine a pilot flying through fog but his navigation gear suddenly stops working. He must call in and have someone else guide him. He flys through the fog blindly relying on someone who’s navigation equipment works. It is the same with us. We must allow someone else to guide us because our compass does not work right some of the times.

You will never get rid of doubts 100%. There will ALWAYS be doubts. Even non scrupulous people deal with doubts. It is part of the human condition. So we trust in God that he knows we are doing the best we can with what we have. And what The Church tells us now is that Scrupulous people need to obey a spiritual director. Complete obedience. You can only work with that. Even with doubts. THAT, is doing the best you can. How will God punish you if you are given wrong advice? You are being obedient. Your spiritual director will answer for what he tells you and I am sure that he wants to do the best he can. You must be courageous through doubts. It is the only way. If you cannot bring yourself to obey even when doubting then you will be lost in scrupulosity.

Obedience is easy. Its the courage to obey even when doubting that you must accomplish. Believe me, I have been there. I worked with a spiritual director for a year to overcome my scrupulosity. I am telling you this because I came out of it better. Scrupulosity about 95% under control.

PM me if you need any encouragement, anytime. I use to suffer just like you and I know how bad it is. I truly sympathize.


#11

Just realized something… Do you simply only have a regular priest that you go to or do you have a spiritual director? If just the former then you need a spiritual director who can also be your confessor. Someone you can meet with at least once a month to help you. I mailed a Carmelite monastery to get a spiritual director. Perhaps there is a Monastery close by that you can do the same with? Or if you can ask your confessor to be your spiritual director or at least if he knows another priest that he can recommend?


#12

I would recommend two things

1: Find a traditional priest. You can know for certain that they give good advice, especially with regards to scrupulosity.

2: Read what St. Alphonsus Ligouri has to say about the scrupulous and what he’s said to those whom he dealt with. St. Alphonsus suffered VERY seriously from scruples as well.


#13

It’s not that she refuses to trust her priest, she actually cannot. Sometimes it’s part of the condition.


#14

Do you have a catholic college or university near you? If so, see if there is a priest in their psychology program who has an advanced degree and experience in mental health counseling. This way you get the best of both worlds. I also seriously suggest not asking scrupulosity questions on this forum. While some people give good advice, most are unfamiliar with the condition and unknowingly make very damaging statements. I have some links that helped me quite a bit in my battle. I’ll post them when I have time, or you can pm me.


#15

do you have professional mental health help


#16

I don’t have money or insurance, so that’s not something I can get.


#17

this is an issue way too difficult to deal with on your own. You don’t have that trust in your Priest. How about phoning the diocese and asking if they have cheap mental health help. Or where you can go to discuss this.

Can I ask if you are a minor or an adult


#18

I’m 25. I’ll try to apply for medicaid again if I don’t get a job soon and research any psychologists. I’ll just have to find another confessor now because I moved from california to nevada recently and haven’t had the courage to go with one.


closed #19

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