How to join the Church - unusual situation

Hello -

My husband and I have been married for 31 years. He was baptized and raised a Lutheran, but stopped going to church in his teens. Before we married he started attending Mass with me, and we were married in the Catholic Church. We raised our three children in the faith.

My husband considers himself a practicing Catholic - he loves the Church. However, he never formally converted. What is required for him to become officially Catholic? He professes the truths of our faith in the Creed weekly at Mass, and receives the Holy Eucharist which he believes to be the body, blood, soul, and divinity of the Lord. After so many years living and believing as a Catholic, is he one?

Thanks for your kind thoughts.

Have you ever spoken to your priest about your husband? He would be able to hear your whole story and advise you. You will get differing opinions on CAF…


No, not yet, but of course we need to. Thanks!


He possibly shouldn’t be eating the Eucharist yet. :heart:


Your priest may see your husband privately for a while or he may have him attend RCIA before he is confirmed. That’s why you should make an appointment and speak to him. I am happy that your husband wants to be Catholic and believes as he does!


So he never received the Sacraments?

Contact your Priest. Your husband would likely need to enroll in RCIA.

But he didn’t make his First Holy Communion in the Catholic Church…

Please, both of you must speak with your Parish Priest.


This thread, and it’s Answers are such a joy to read.
@filiaecclesia please, before your husband attends Mass next, he should be discussing receiving the Eucharist now. It is form that those in a state of grace receive the Eucharist. To achieve a state of grace , a Catholic attends the Sacrament of Reconcilliation. The Priest can discuss all this further with you and your husband.

Have you received all the Sacraments?


A profession of faith and confirmation, after suitable instruction.

He should seek an appointment with your pastor to discuss the situation if he desires to enter full communion with the Church.

Since he is baptized, there are many approaches your pastor can take.

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As has already been noted, he should receive some instruction, either in a class or from the priest, and then be Confirmed after making a formal declaration of Faith. Your pastor can advise you on this.

I am reminded of a friend in a previous parish who was not Catholic but attended Mass with his Catholic wife every Sunday for decades, even becoming president of the parish Men’s Club. One year he decided to make it formal, went through RCIA and became Catholic.

You may also need to allow for the possibility that you will get differing opinions from different priests, even within the same diocese. With any luck, you’ll find a priest who will appoint you as your husband’s sponsor, which is the way it was handled in my case. The whole procedure needn’t take more than a few weeks.

I ought to explain that “you” here is addressed to @filiaecclesia, not to @Irishmom2. Apologies for the mixup.

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