How to know if I were gay


How can a person know if he himself were gay? Is sexual identity only a social imagination or is it real?


Have you thought about asking a gay person this question? They might have a better insight than a straight person.


Have you engaged in sexual relations with someone of the same sex? Do you want to? If the answer is “yes”, then you are.


Only if he doesn’t have an equal or greater drive to do this with someone of the opposite sex.


Do you find members of the same sex attractive? As a man I’ve never looked at another man and thought to myself “boy, I want to run up and give him a kiss”

When I see a good looking woman walk by I’ve about snapped my neck on occasion.


You’ll most likely have known since you were young. Stuff like, oh I magically have LBGT feelings, does not happen. People can be suicidal at a young age over such feelings which is more than enough proof.


I hear people saying this, but I don’t think so.

I went to a large inner city public high school here in Pittsburgh and graduated in the 1970’s. Not a single homosexual student, although a few of teachers were supposed to be gay.

I think a lot of children are brought into alternative sexuality at a younger and younger age nowadays because all of the positivity toward it on the media in recent years.


Or maybe they didn’t tell you? Or come out? I have no idea why people in such a time period would have hid it… :thinking:


Have you not considered that it was illegal to have homosexual sex? It’s called a sodomy law and it is still on the books in many states though rendered unenforceable. You could easily lose your job too. Why do you think being gay was expressed in seedy bars and in dark allies? Being gay is still something that will cause you problems in many schools and is not well received by everyone, clearly not yourself. Again, as I said, the suicide rate is much higher in the LGBT world than others. If this is some magical land of acceptance, why would someone feel so worthless such as to remove themselves from this planet?

That makes no sense.


Not being gay back in the 1970’s posed problems as well. In 9th grade, several of the other children accused me of being a homosexual. Not true, and I was pressed into fighting one of the other children to get the claim retracted.


You can tell if you feel attracted to members of the same sex exclusively. If you feel attracted to both in some measure it would be bisexuality/pansexuality. Have a chat with a counsellor if you’re wondering these things, they may be able to help in a nice, professional setting.


If you find yourself attracted to the same sex, you probably have same-sex- or both-sex-attraction.

It’s not something imaginary, it deals with your hormones.


Mmhm. That’s a poor example of not being gay presenting a problem. That’s a problem of people feeling other folks sexuality is their business, or that homosexuality is a source of shame.


I think you are straight man. You dont need porn, self abuse and any lustful images to prove that. No. Thats a trick. Maybe someone wants you to think of being gay to make you watch impure things. No. Trust Jesus. He defeated evil


That wasn’t the case in Pennsylvania. When I was in high school, there were all kinds of open homosexuals in town- particularly along Liberty Ave. They are making a films about it in Hollywood now, featuring Scarlett Johansson.


Well, do you ever talk about gay people? Say, an old tenant who just so happened to be gay? If so you’re probably gay. Don’t worry though! If you are, all you have to do is stare at strange women in public and keep doing so until you start feeling a little tingly down there. I have it on good authority from another thread that this is how it works. :thumbsup:


So I may have misread this and I admit I’m from Aus, but this seems to show that homosexual activity was illegal in Pennsylvannia until 1980;


But this doesn’t mean that the attractions will last.

I’d say this is one of the problems of our current hyper sexualized culture- Kids who are confused about their gender/sexual orientation in the midst of the hormonal soup of puberty are said to just ‘go with their gut’ even though, statistically, when they reach sexual maturity, those feelings will stop for the most of them.


I don’t really think a “large inner city public high school in Pittsburgh” in the 70s is a place where students would have readily come out of the closet. My husband was from Pittsburgh and his parents were teachers in the public school system, and it seems more likely that a student in that environment would have been focused on getting through his or her day while avoiding physical violence and bullying.


I admit the question was a wee bit tongue in cheek. :slight_smile:

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit