The intention is not to avoid giving too much. The intention is to avoid giving in the wrong way.
For instance, if you are pressed to go a mile, you go two: that is what we are to do. You give generously, even when you are pressed into giving.
On the other hand, you have to avoid becoming a near occasion of sin by encouraging someone to become a user or to teach them to get through life by manipulating others. I was taught this is the “third way”: when you are struck, you turn the other cheek not only instead of hitting back, but also instead of falling down and giving in to evil. You do speak the truth and encourage others to also live virtuous lives. This is particularly true when you are dealing with brothers and sisters in Christ.
Secondly, there is also a time to pour yourself out and a time to “come away for awhile.” You do have to avoid letting a few people use you up so that you can’t do your future work as you ought to do.
As to dealing with relatives, it is well to remember this incident from the Gospels:
*Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to share the inheritance with me.” He replied to him, “Friend, who appointed me as your judge and arbitrator?” Then he said to the crowd, “Take care to guard against all greed, for though one may be rich, one’s life does not consist of possessions.” *Luke 12:13-15
It is important to step back often and ask yourself what your motives are when you are in family conflicts. It helps to step back and take a compassionate look at the best light you can put on your siblings’ motives and a realistic view of the likelihood that you will get them to amend lifelong faults by direct means. It is a balancing act, because as the family therapist once put it:* “The definition of a dysfunctional family is this: A dysfunctional family is any family with more than one person in it.” *We all have quirks, faults, and red buttons, and nothing makes them show up like a family crisis. Dealing with these with a sense of affection and a sense of humor really helps. That doesn’t mean letting your siblings get into a habit of sin. It does mean stepping back and looking at what is best for the souls involved, and let the other stuff come second. Again: easier said than done!!!