How will I overcome Scrupulosity?


I am a 19 year old college student who recently (about a year and a half ago) came back to the church. I go to confession on a regular basis, but I struggle with scrupulosity and Pure-OCD. Now every time I go to receive communion, I second guess myself. I never feel truly able to receive unless I just went to confession right before the mass! I know that others have asked this question and the answer is unless you are SURE you are in a state of mortal sin, you should receive. But my question is, what if I have a sin that I forgot to confess that keeps weighing on my heart? Others have said that once I become aware of a mortal sin I have forgotten, it is absolved but I should mention it in confession anyway. But where does it end? What if I suddenly remember a sin I committed 10 years ago? Do I really have to confess that too even if I have been to confession countless times since? To me this seems like a never-ending cycle. And I feel like if I DO confess these sins, i am somehow denying that God’s grace was enough the first time. The reason I ask this is because I have a specific sin that I committed about 8 months ago that I never thought of as a sin/forgot in every confession since. What makes this sin any different than the ones I committed as a young teenager that I have forgotten to confess? I feel like I am always in a state of mortal sin and sometimes I even question whether it is worth praying if I am cut off from God. It doesn’t help that other faithful catholics have told me that the same sins I consider mortal (like gossip), they consider venial-- I feel like every sin I commit is mortal. I am just so incredibly confused and my OCD does not help. Most of the time I end up taking communion no matter what because I am embarrassed not to take it in front of my family/I figure that if I am unsure about the state of my soul then it is okay. But then I end up confessing it out of my guilt anyway. I don’t know how to be free from this cycle of guilt/doubt that others seem to have no problem with. I just need to know that I am in good standing with God and that I am not constantly living in a state of sin because of things I did ages ago or things that I am not sure about!

Thank you!

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]* What should I do regarding these scrupulous issues?**
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]* How do I conquer scrupulosity?**

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