**I have been blessed with a hubby who can be very helpful. So of course when our elderly and disabled neighbors needed a hand he was right there.
It started out small… stuff like helping the man get his wife (who is partially paralyzed from a stroke) into their van after he had heart surgery. No big deal…glad to help.
But just recently things have changed big time. It started last weekend when the neighbor’s adult son (who had been helping as much as he could between his job and wife/child) had to be out of town. The neighbor’s mentally handicapped daughter (adult) came over and told my hubby that her dad needed his help. (the dad just recently had heart surgery, is battling uncontrolled diabetes and also had a mental breakdown).
So he goes over and apparently they had been waiting for 4 hours for someone to come help his wife to the bathroom and she couldn’t wait anymore. So my hubby helped. It was very awkward for him but they had no one else… then he ended up having to help the man too. Personally I would have trouble helping my own parents in that situation, never mind neighbors that we only knew very superficially before all of this.
Since then hubby has been called on to do all kinds of things from checking out a malfunctioning wheelchair to tucking them in for the night. Since we realize that this is beyond what we should be expected to do (and since hubby is not a trained nurse really *shouldn’t ***be doing) we took steps to get them some help. Hubby talked to the son, located a seniors in home care business and was also informed that the couples adult daughter who is recently divorced will soon be moving in with them… but we don’t know when.
The handicapped daughter has shown up at our home multiple times asking for help…once when we were already in bed. It has become so bad that we had to disconnect our doorbell. We keep telling them that they have to give us a call and if we can we’ll help. But it is getting ridiculous. No sooner than hubby’s car pulls up the drive the daughter is coming over and asking him for help. Poor Lily balled her eyes out yesterday because she missed her daddy and as soon as he came home he was called to the neighbor’s.
Now I don’t mind hubby helping…but I think we need to set some sort of boundaries… but we really don’t know how.:o What would you do? What would you consider appropriate?