I’m really concerned about my DH. He’s been like this ever since we began dating but it seems to just get worse. He is ALWAYS worrying about something… to the point where it has, in the past, hurt his ability to sleep through the night or fall asleep and he’s had to take a sleep aid.
He is worried about the normal things, debt and saving and whether our apartment is big enough, etc., expenses, but also a ton of little other things. It’s hard to explain, but sometimes it seems like he invents things to worry about – not that he DOES, but it is a serious problem that ails him and I am very concerned. He’s been miserable a lot lately, all because of this worrying… he worries about whether I get out enough, worries about getting rid of all the boxes we have in our apt., worries about EVERYTHING. Always tired, always stressed.
I told him now today I have no idea what to do to make him stop worrying so much anymore. Whenever he is worried, I do my best to ease him, talking it out and gently explaining that things will be fine and he doesn’t have to burden his mind, etc., I always do my best to do my part at home – laundry, having his lunches packed, dinner ready, so he can feel nothing but relaxed when he gets home. And I know for the evening that helps him immensely and he thanks me and is so joyful telling me how what I do really makes him feel better. But I know it’s only temporary, and the next day he’s miserable in his worries again!!! He also worries about things I have to do… like if it’s laundry day for me he’ll call me to remind me to do laundry today… or ask if I’m doing it… things like that that he can’t just leave to me, he worries about them too. He said last night he doesn’t know if he will enjoy our upcoming vacation because he will be worrying about all the work sitting on his desk that he has to come back to!!
Often he doesn’t want to talk about things, he just despairs. Has anyone else had a person/hubby with this problem – what did you do to help? We used to see a therapist together, never got to mention this worry problem, and now it’s too expensive for us to go back to him. Any books, articles, recommendations?