I am beginning to despair

Hi everyone,
I just wanted to get some feedback from everyone out there.

I have been praying hard for the conversion of my husband, but I am already growing hopeless. I have a problem with patience and fortitude in this matter and I know that God might be trying to improve me through this trial. However, I have yet to see any change in my husband and I am starting to feel that my prayers are in vain, or that it is not God’s will that he come to the Catholic faith. We have been married 6 years and he is very devoted to his protestant church (which is very anti-Catholic).

So, does praying for conversion really work? Should I continue? Do you guys have any inspiring stories? Is there anything else I should do?

Please keep me and my husband in your prayers!

I have been married to an SDA for 23 years - yes I understand anti-catholic! I have been praying for all these years but he still does not convert. I think about St. Monica who prayed for 30 years for her son to convert and she was a saint, so how much longer I figure I will have to pray. It is not my job to convert my husband that is up to the Holy Spirit. My job is to raise my children in the faith and to live my own faith.

I also think of my brother who fell away from the Catholic Church, we prayed for him for many many years . We did not think he would ever return but kept praying. When he was in the hospital dying my sister said to him - “I just lied to the hospital chaplain - I told them you were Catholic.” To which my brother responded, “No, you did not lie I have returned to the Church, I have gone to mass and confession. I am Catholic.” He was able to receive the annointing of the sick, eucharist and confession before he died. He died with so much peace.

Do not dispair - God does things in his own time and in ways we do not understand. Your job is to live your faith and pray. It is not your job to convert your husband. Do not dispair. It will happen.

Don’t despair - God’s timing is the BEST timing! For some encouragement, go here: catholic.net/rcc/Periodicals/Faith/0102-97/bio.html and read the story of Elisabeth LeSeur - A Marriage Saved in heaven.

It should give you some hope and some good reading!

Keep the faith and keep praying in faith.


Thanks for the link!

I remember those days… my hubby converted 5 years ago from being S Baptist. I prayed, fasted and gave many sacrifices for his conversion - and didnt see any change! :frowning:
One day God questioned me: Would I rather have a HOLY Baptist husband then an uncaring/unpracticising Catholic one?

My prayer immediately changed.
I realized that more then anything - I wanted a good, holy, devout Christian man.
And thats exactly what my prayer became…
3 months later he announced his decision to become Catholic!

Hang in there, Struggle.
Our timing is not His!

Also try the book “Amazing Grace for Married Couples” by Jeff Cavins, Matthew Pinto, and Patti Armstrong. You can find it here: amazon.com/Amazing-Grace-Married-Couples-Life-Changing/dp/1932645799/ref=sr_11_1/002-7722109-7280029?ie=UTF8

While you pray for the conversion of your husband, please pray for the conversion of all the members of God’s family who are away from the Church. There are many graces waiting to come down to so many people who are ready for conversion, but no one is praying for them! Your husband may have to wait another 20 years before he’s ready, but in the meantime your prayers can help others. Of course keep praying fervently for your husband, but don’t forget all the other people who are in need of similar prayers too :slight_smile:

Keep praying, and fear not. My wife and I were married in the Catholic Church, and she was received into the Church – after we’d been married 35 years :smiley:

Bob Hope, who lived to be 100, was past 90 and longer married when he was received into the Church.



"When nothing seems to help, I go and look at a stonecutter hammering away at his rock perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it. Yet at the hundred and first blow it will split in two, and I know it was not that blow that did it, but all that had gone before." -Jacob Riis

Thanks so much for the encouragement. Things have been so hard for us. We will be going to a Retrouvaille weekend soon and I hope it helps.

I know that I am a very impatient person and that I must trust in the Lord and His time. I just feel like I need some outward sign to keep my hope up.

What is your opinion on fasting for a prayer intention?

Thats quite a cross. Pray, hope and don’t worry.

I cant remember where in the bible (Matthew?) it says that sometimes its prayers AND fasting that removes the…

yes,** I **am a believer in fasting for prayer intentions!
Not always fasting from foods though, but lately fasting from the interent has helped my spirituality deepen :thumbsup: and believe me - I need ALL the help I can get!
God bless.

My husband’s aunt has two daughters who left the Catholic Faith when they got married. Her oldest daughter was very anti-Catholic and even yelled at my husband for being a Catholic. Here she is now 35 years after she left the Church, wondering if it was the right decision. She is reading Catholic books and learning about the Faith. Her mother is very happy to hear that her daughter will come back soon HOME! So far she is agreeing with all she is reading on the explainations of many things that she opposed of before.
Like everyone says, keep praying and don’t give up.:thumbsup:

I have two success stories for you. Both women prayed for their husbands’ conversion for over TWENTY YEARS. One was agnostic and I really never thought he would ever even go to RCIA. The wife was told to read up on the green scapular, and she ended up putting one in his pillow case and after 6-7 years of that he did become Catholic. The other one was just a devout woman praying daily…of course both prayed the rosary daily and always prayed for their husbands’ conversion.

That sounds like so long, I know. I agree with another poster that it is better to have a believing Christian man, rather than a Catholic man who goes through the motions…I’ve just recently started a prayer campaign for Mary and Jesus to call my husband to be a true Christian…he’s Catholic, but he needs a lot of divine intervention.

Keep on praying…


I waited 16 years. I knew a couple where it took the wife 35 years. Remember our time is not God’s time. He views thing in the context of eternity. Hang in there and keep praying. Once it happens you’ll never look back and the time will have seemed to have gone quickly.

Prayer always works. Don’t despair!

Maybe you can get the tape of Scott Hahn’s conversion story from Mary Foundation and let your husband listen to it.
Maybe when you are taking a car trip you can listen to it together.
That is a very good tape of conversion, from a Protestant minister
to a Catholic scholar. Very convincing.

God bless!

Yes, I have this CD and it is excellent! There is no way on earth my husband would listen to it.

I know how you feel. I’ve been praying for DH’s conversion for 13 years now. Throughout all of those years, I never lost faith that my prayers would be answered and I knew that it could take years for it to happen. But my faith has really been shaken in this past year and I have found myself questionig whether God was listening to me.

I think I stink at praying and I’m probably not doing it right. And I also know that I need quite a bit of conversion myself, and sometimes that makes me feel like a hypocrite for praying for DH’s conversion.

I guess patience is my problem. I know God’s time is not my time, but I feel that there would be so much more unity and harmony in our family if my husband would convert. It would solve many issues between us and cause less confusion for our children. My husband is very strong in his religious beliefs and I fear that this will cause conflict with the kids.

Ok, I’m confessing my stupidity. What does DH stand for? I also post on a widow’s site and always assumed it meant dead husband? Does it mean dear husband? or something entirely different?

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