I dont know how to feel anymore


Im a 20 year old catholic who is constantly in mortal sin. Ive tried to better myself but the more i try and study the more distraught and hopeless i feel. It started with modest ways of dressing to finding about person who had a vision of hell who said even those who desire evil but dont act on it still are sent to hell (excuse me for not remembering but i panicked and left the page immediately) I fear that not only i but all who i love cant make it to heaven. Ive talked to my confirmation sponsor, my mother, a therapist, and a catholic hotline operator about this but It hasn’t changed. My priest is very busy and probably has very little time he can spare. Does anyone know anyone I can speak to


First, do not believe “private revelations”, they are not binding on you.

Hopeless is how Satan wants you to feel.

Do not despair the mercy and love of Christ.

When you begin to despair, say “Thank you Jesus for your mercy.” Make it a habit.


Thank you very much for your advice


Asli seek a spiritual advisor such as a priest or if you are female ask the diocese to connect you with a religious sister or consencrated woman who can give you spiritual counsel. :slight_smile:


Your posts are always so good and intelligent. I love reading them.


Do what you should be doing and then maybe a bit more. Attend mass on Sunday, but maybe try to make it sometime during the week as well. Say your prayers, but perhaps attend Adoration sometime. Go to confession. Keep reading and learning, but not on the internet. Read a book. People here would be happy to recommend Catholic things for you to read. Do not watch random videos on YouTube, they will only confuse you more. If you are constantly in mortal sin, you may have too much free time. Volunteer somewhere on campus if you are in school, or at your parish.


Thank you very much


Thank you so much


Thank you.


A book I’d recommend is “Searching For and Maintaining Peace” by Fr Jaques Phillipe


You might try looking up any question you have in the Catechism, this will help ensure that the information you are getting is in keeping with the Church. This is online. I type Catechism…followed by my question in brief, usually it brings up the relevant text.

If I had many questions I might write them down over a short period of time and try to make an appointment with my priest or deacon to talk to one of them about the issues I may have.

The Catholic answers website may well have good answers to your questions as well.

I steer clear of YouTube videos as a rule, the content is spurious and as you have found can actually have detrimental effects on your faith.
God bless.


That might help you:

2.Confess your sins with regularity.
3. Have a devotion to Our Lady and her spouse, St. Joseph. (The scapular and the three Hail Mary’s are great)
4. Read about hell, so you will know why you should battle with all your strength to go upstairs.
5. Identify what makes you do what you do, your weak points, and start avoiding them even if they are licit things.


As a 20YO in college, I struggle with masturbation and pornographic images and I have found the best help is listening to holy music, reading good books (Matt Fradd and Jason Evert books as well as Matthew Kelly mainly, Daily Mass, Adoration, daily Rosary, daily divine mercy chapet, frequent reading of the Bible and so on.

If you feel you are in a state of mortal sin you should go to confession and then instead of telling yourself “I won’t do X again!” actively pursue a stronger faith life because that is a positive goal that will help you move forward!

Try doing the Rosary everyday with the intention of patience and clarity for what God is calling you to do. I would also recommend that you take a look at Fr. Mike Schmitz on YouTube who has great videos on countless topics you may be concerned with, as well as Matt Fradd’s podcast on Pints with Aquintas if you want some theology to help you, or specifically if you are a female, try Cameron Fradd’s Among the Lilies podcast.

You shouldn’t view hell as a punishment that God will send you to. We chose hell through our actions. Instead of being afraid of hell and sinning, be afraid of offending God through our sins.

God Bless,

  • Matt


Best searchable version I know of http://www.scborromeo.org/ccc.htm


I use this one mostly, only because my browser throws it up first usually


Don’t know?


This is another that is bookmark worthy!



Well first off, you have had some good advice on here so I won’t knock that. I agree, pray, go to mass and confess your sins often. God loves you very very much and wants you to go to heaven. Anyone who tells you anything else is lying and is most likely listening to the devil, simple. No one, can say whether you or your family are likely to go to heaven or hell, so don’t try to guess. Only God will decide and even then only when they die. Read St Faustina’s Diary as it tells you a lot about God’s Divine mercy and you will not be afraid again. It is a long book though, 600 pages…
2 other things, about the mortal sin, ask God to help you get out of it and stay out of it. Who else is going to help you? Be serious, get down on your knees and beg him to help you, admit to him all you bad parts and why and wherefores and beg and plead for him to help you stop. He will help you. Every Time you fail, seek His mercy and start again. Second thing, dont assume your priest is so busy he can’t help you, ask him if he has any advice for you or if he can bless you in your endeavour to stop this sin or even if he’ll pray for you. Or if he can recommend anyone to help you. It is unlikely he has not heard of these issues before. Be a warrior for God. Have you tried sacramentals? some Holy water around your home to help you when you feel tempted? praying the rosary when you feel tempted? Make the sign of the cross too. A particular saints medal may help? Could your priest come and bless your home? God bless you, I will pray for you


Just remember, St Faustina’s Diary is private revelation and is not binding on anyone of us except St. Faustina.


I once remember listening to Fr. Simon on Relevant Radio, & he said that if you struggle with vice, the way to conquer vice is with virtue.




Maybe make an appointment to talk to your priest. God is so merciful. There is nothing that you cannot be forgiven for, except ultimately rejecting God forever. The devil likes us to be discouraged and despondent. God wants us to feel loved and hopeful. He never tires of forgiving us. You obviously want to do the right thing. We all fail. I’m 62 years old, and I fall short everyday. Don’t give up. St.Padre Pio told us, “Pray, hope, don’t worry.” I’ve come to realize that we are all sinners. We might have sins that, despite repenting, we fall again and do the same darn thing. We go to Confession and then we need to have confidence that our sins are forgiven. I think the greater sin is not to trust that God forgives us. Do your best and be at peace.

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