Hi everyone. This is my first thread and I became a member today.
Anyway, I just wanted to discuss something that’s been truly bothering me.
I used to suffer from scrupulosity. I think I still do in some ways, but it’s hard to be sure.
Lately, I’ve been making the terrible mistake of being too lax with my sins. It’s overall very, very confusing. I’ve recently found Scrupulosity Anonymous, whic hI wish I used earlier.
Like any other person I suffer from random, sinful thoughts. Normally I would say a quick prayer to drive them out. However, I was not strict with myself one time, and I dwelled and became aroused by my thoughts.
In retrospect, the fact that I decided to become sinfully pleased by my thoughts is mortal sin.
However, with the confusion of being ex-scrupulous I thought “well, it’s just a thought. I didn’t act on it, therefore it can’t be mortal…”
so I accepted the Eucharist that Sunday.
I’ve done this more than once, thinking that it’s not mortal
Have I really done something wrong?
I don’t feel too good. In fact, I think I should be feeling worse. Someone once told me accepting hte Eucharist in the state of sin is like having Christ suffer his passion again.