Dear Sir or Ma'am,
This to all the experts out there! I am currently a junior in high school, and I'm 17 years old. I keep hearing God saying he wants me for himself, but the problem is I'm scared and I don't know where to begin? Can you please give me some advice? I've thought about religious life since I was 15 years old, now I'm seriously starting to discern what it is that God wants me to do; however the problem is that I'm in my valley in life so I can't seem to hear his voice anymore. Also how do I really truthfully know what God wants me to be, or if this really is him asking me to enter the Religious Life?
I feel LOST!!!!!
I'm SO Confused!!! I've had some weird thoughts lately too that don't help me at all. I keep thinking that I wish I was a boy, so then I could become a Priest, however I can't because I'm a girl. I think I'm feeling this way partly because I have low self-asteem, I think at times that I'm worthless or not worthy enough to enter religious life, and I think somehow find it really hard to believe at this moment in my life, that women help this world. I keep thinking how could I, a mere small young lady make a stand in the world, if to others or myself I feel like nothing. I wish so badly that I do not think this but I do. I know this is a weird question, but when I heard the scripture reading about where it tells you to take up your cross and follow Him, Can people still have fun, be human, laugh, and live life, or are they completely consumed by the will to do God's will?
Lastly Please pray for me and my process in discernment, and please pray for my friend who is going through trying to relearn how to walk again. Thanks for your answers ahead of time! (PS. I think it would probably help you to know that I'm a girl!) :)
A Friend in Christ,