I do love my husband sometimes and I melt inside when I think of what and how he is putting up with me. But often I find myself not respecting him, critisizing him etc. I really do think I have valid points, but I also think that all husbands, even the ones whose wives love them to bits have horrid imperfections and have done bad things to hurt their wives or themselves.
I would like to know know about women who had a hard time respecting their husbands and then through prayer managed to became better at it. (yes I know about ST. Monica and her advice for women to hold their silly tongues)
I am working on this as my primary spiritual goal to at least not give my opinion out loud (and act like I respect him) and to hopefully learn to trully respect him.
When I search my heart I think the main reason why I don’t respect him is that he has earned far less than his potential over the 6 years of our marriage, and though we have had what we needed their were times we didn’t have much. We are still officially a “low income family” but really we do have what we need. ALso I have had to scramble and call friends for a lone about three or four times in the first two three years. I think he doesn’t optimize his use of time and (he isn’t exactly lazy) and could do much better. I am used to my father as a male role model who is constantly focused and driven. My husband is not that way at all.
Also he has a temper that will flair up the odd time and it is horrid. He usually yells, sometimes breaks things or recently has punched me in the arm. He has actually touched me about four times in anger and threatened to hit me at other times.
I told him that violence is a problem that he has to deal with just as I see a spiriual director to help me be a better wife and he has agreed to see our priest.