I am facing a huge moral dilemma right now, or at least it is huge to me. I hate to lie. HATE IT.
Bottom line, I called in sick late last night for work today, at the large institution I work for. Why did I do this? Well basically, I’ve been struggling with some pretty serious depression, and yesterday it hit its limit…I was crying, despondent, hopeless, and truly feeling incapable of making it to work and acting “normal”.
To top it all off, my on-off boyfriend called me very late last night and only made my depression and anxiety worse…it was literally head-buried-in-my-pillow-crying-my-eyes-out-time after that…and he didn’t let me off the phone til almost 2am, with my having to be at work at 6:30am.
I deeply, profoundly regret lying to my boss last night when I called in sick, but I have worked there long enough to know that calling in sick for the reasons I had (depressed, sad, emotionally worn out) would be met with cynicism, disdain, and a “suck it up and come on in to work” attitude.
So I lied.
I told him I had been very nauseous, throwing up, etc, and needed to stay home. And I have felt contrite about doing it ever since, even though I know that for the sake of my mental health, I needed to stay home. My missing work today was a minor inconvenience at best, as I will be paid from my accrued sick bank, and they had someone to cover for me, but still…I know I lied.
My question? When I go to confession to my priest, state the facts as I have expressed them here, state my profound sorrow for lying and genuinely resolve to never do this again, do you feel that the priest is going to require me to admit my lie to my co-workers? On the few occasions I have confessed lying before, I’ve never known the priest to insist I confess to the lied to party as well.
This is really stressing me out, but I realize fully that this is a situation of my own making.
God bless you,