I need help!!


#1

Hello. I’m new here so I don’t really know how this works? I was born and raised as a Catholic and drifted far far away from the Church and faith since I was a young teenager. I didn’t think much at all about religion. Recently, however, I have come to find my way back to the Church. I have been attending Mass, gone to confession, will be observing Lent, and have been reading the Bible nightly. The problem though is that for the past year and a half I have been living with my girlfriend. When we first met, and eventually moved in together, I thought nothing about religion, but now it’s different. At first, I knew she was an atheist (you could even call her a devout atheist) and even though I said that I believed in God and Jesus Christ it didn’t matter to much to me because talking about faith without actually thinking about it was about as far as I went. Now, however, I have been finding my way back to the Church and don’t know how to deal with my situation. The chances of me getting my girlfriend to change are slim and none, especially since she just recently told me that there is no chance that she will ever go to any church. I’m deeply troubled don’t know what to do. How do I deal with this?


#2

u need to be more clear!!! is this ur lesbian girlfreind–or girl freind…sorrry but it is a bit unclear–if its ur freind than just keep witnessing to her–if its ur lesbian partenr you need to get out of that sinful relationship—flee


#3

no, I’m a guy. I have been living with her for the past year and a half. It wasn’t a problem until just recently when I have started trying to come back to the Church. I am not a lesbian.


#4

advice still holds, you need to get out of this relationship, you will make no spiritual progress as long as you are what is rightly called “living in sin”. Even if you were both Catholic and contemplating marriage in the near future, the advice still holds, more, the moral command still holds. Get to confession, talk to the priest, tell him your situation, take his advice. The graces from this sacrament will help you have the strength to do what you have to do.


#5

Hello Frankie,

I was once in your situation, my now husband was once a so called athiest, and although I don’t think I really did drift far from the faith I did drift. When we first meet he would always say things like he would never go to church. After we got married we would have arguements about when we had children how they would be raised. I think that being that I did have a faith filled back ground I had more pull on this part. While adventually we did have children of course they were baptised and now they go to catholic schools(this was actually my husbands idea) Although we still have our moments I believe that he has really come around. he does go to church with us alot of the time and he will pray with us and he has said the rosery with us.

The only advise I can give to you is first of all you must stop having a marital relationship with your girlfriend until you are married, and you must live an example for her. Also pray, pray and pray St Monica is an excellent Saint to pray to for conversion.

Good luck!:wink:


#6

Living with your girlfriend outside of marriage (Whether she is atheist or not!) is the more pressing issue here. As puzzleannie said, you will make no spiritual progress when living with a woman with whom you are not married.Listen to puzzleannie, she has good advice:

Get to confession, talk to the priest, tell him your situation, take his advice. The graces from this sacrament will help you have the strength to do what you have to do.

Remember also, that when you figure out what you should do, you will be able to come up with alot of reasons why you shouldn’t do it. Don’t listen to the reasons! It’s the devil talking! It doesn’t matter how much you and your girlfriend love eachother, or how much time is left on the lease, or how difficult it will be if one of you has to move out. If you trust in the Lord and do as he would want, he’ll take care of you AND your girlfriend.


#7

Living with your girlfriend outside of marriage (Whether she is atheist or not!) is the more pressing issue here. As puzzleannie said, you will make no spiritual progress when living with a woman with whom you are not married.Listen to puzzleannie, she has good advice:

Get to confession, talk to the priest, tell him your situation, take his advice. The graces from this sacrament will help you have the strength to do what you have to do.

Remember also, that when you figure out what you should do, you will be able to come up with alot of reasons why you shouldn’t do it. Don’t listen to the reasons! It’s the devil talking! It doesn’t matter how much you and your girlfriend love eachother, or how much time is left on the lease, or how difficult it will be if one of you has to move out. If you trust in the Lord and do as he would want, he’ll take care of you AND your girlfriend.


#8

Living with your girlfriend outside of marriage (Whether she is atheist or not!) is the more pressing issue here. As puzzleannie said, you will make no spiritual progress when living with a woman with whom you are not married.Listen to puzzleannie, she has good advice:

Get to confession, talk to the priest, tell him your situation, take his advice. The graces from this sacrament will help you have the strength to do what you have to do.

Remember also, that when you figure out what you should do, you will be able to come up with alot of reasons why you shouldn’t do it. Don’t listen to the reasons! It’s the devil talking! It doesn’t matter how much you and your girlfriend love eachother, or how much time is left on the lease, or how difficult it will be if one of you has to move out. If you trust in the Lord and do as he would want, he’ll take care of you AND your girlfriend.


#9

Frankie,

I can relate to what your saying…you are considered a revert in your faith, and the Holy Spirit has called you back to the Church, I know this b/c it happened to me…also right in the middle of a relationship I was having ( however I was married to a presbyterian) but still an non-sacramental marriage! we are now living as brother and sister until we can be married in the Church.
I would suggest you go talk to a priest ASAP and tell him your dilemma, he will help you with your spiritual journey and advice with your girlfriend. Because she is atheist, she will hinder your relationship with Christ (no room for you to grow in faith) with her in the picture unless she has a “big” change of heart.
God Bless and welcome back home!


#10

Something, maybe the Holy Spirit has been pushing you back to the Church. You admit this. Why? If you want a few months or years of sexual pleasure instead of an eternity with God then that is your choice.

You seem to have made a choice without thinking. God can forgive that, if you confess it, I mean living with a woman in an illicite manner.

If you value your immortal soul, you will move out and not come back. Learn to be a Catholic again. Then marry a Catholic girl. That atheist girl will get you nothing but the fruits of the Devil.


#11

Hello. It’s wonderful that you’re coming back. It will make all the difference to you. It’s unclear what you mean by your “coming back”. Does that mean you’re attending mass? Does it mean you’ve made a good confession and are receiving communion? If you have a good, devout priest available to you, I would certainly advise you to talk it over with him. If you don’t have one, try looking around to see if you can find one in neighboring parishes or perhaps a nearby monastery. It would be nice if it were someone you’re comfortable with, but devout is the key.

Then you might try asking your girlfriend if she would attend mass with you, or meet with you and him to talk things over. Or, you might invite your priest home for dinner so she could see him in a relaxed, social setting. Then she could at least see that he doesn’t have horns.

The thing is, you need to get it across to her that this is something that’s extremely important to you and, because she’'s also extremely important to you (she is, isn’t she?), that you really want her to give you a fair hearing about all this.

Here’s the hard part. How important are YOU to HER? If you’re important, she should be willing to go at least part way down this road. Explore things a little. Test the water. If she rejects that completely, then you have a choice to make. Maybe this is a relationship which you need to get out of while the getting is good. May God by with you in this.


#12

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