I need opinions fast... (please)


Back in October, DH and I put up one of the bedrooms of our house for rent. We searched for the right person, until we thought we had found it. Well, we asked for a clean, non-smoking, quiet, drug-free, drama-free, reliable and responsible person. So we got one, so we thought.

Ok, because by law we can’t ask publicly to have a Catholic or another Christian with good morals, I had to go the above route. We specifically asked for ONE person.

So this guy we have living upstairs doesn’t care that he wakes us up very early in the morning, very late at night, or a few hrs after midnight. He has let his gf “live” here with him and they go about they’re business that only married people should be doing and they don’t care that we’re in the house. His room right above ours, so we can hear EVERYTHING!!! :mad: So, I’ve had it with this guy. I haven’t sleept well since he moved in (which has been since Oct 22). I am getting to the point I can’t even stand the guy.

He lied to us, he’s not quiet, nor clean, and he doesn’t respect sleeping hrs at all. This morning they woke me up at 7 doing their “stuff”, I was very angry they had woken me up, this had been the first time in a long time to actually sleep through the night. I don’t have to work today, so I was planning on staying in asleep (if I could) till 8-9 am. The other day, we got permission from him to go to his bathroom and fix something with the shower, and the bathroom was more than digusting. Dirty underwear, the sink full of toothpaste (it looks like he has never even cleaned it), the sink is gross, the floor is gross, the mirror is all dirty.

So, he’s dirty, loud, doesn’t care about letting us sleep, he has left his gf live here (she leaves early in the morning and gets here around 11:30 or midnight so we “don’t notice” she’s living here. :mad: What’s gotten me fed up is that they have sex in my house and they don’t care we’re here. They’re LOUD. I’m sick and tired of this. I shouldn’t have to take this in a very Christian home!!!

What I’m getting at is… what can I do as the homeowner? I wanted to write a letter to him telling him he lied about being clean, quiet, etc and that he has the girl living here, and that he is LOUD. I have a copy of the ad I published with all the things we asked for before we let him live here. I plan on giving him a copy of that with a complaint of all the things he’s lied about. Is this something I can do? I mean, in an apt. complex, a landlord won’t let you make noise after 10pm or before 8am. So, why should we allow that in our house?? I mean, and not even having the decency of doing their **** when we’re not home, but do it when we’re here or when we’re sleeping and wake us up???

Yeah, the money we get from that is helping us financially, but I rather have money problems that be living w/this guy. I miscarried my baby last month, and I spent the entire wk at home getting better from the car accident that caused it and from the pain and trauma of losing our baby. He didn’t care I was here trying to rest and sleep. I didn’t even get to sleep once during the day because of the problems above, and he’d be on the phone till about 1am (talking very loud), arguing with the girl upstairs, or making so much noise it’d make me more angry.

Any suggestions on how I should proceed? Is the letter fine? Do I have rights as a homeowner to tell him what he can or cannot do in my house?


Call your city to see what rights you have as a landlord, and consider hiring a lawyer if you need to. These things can be very touchy, especially if you start mentioning your own religious beliefs and that he is having sex without being married. Really - it is none of your business (though I agree with you, I would not want it happening in my house either). You may have gotten yourself in a sticky place, I would call the city first then call a lawyer.



If he didnt sign a lease you can throw him out now. if he did youlll have to get an attorney to break it.


Hi yessian;

Yes–you do have rights…do you explicitly state that only he can live there? No guests for undue amounts of time? He may say ‘she is a guest,’ but if you can prove otherwise, then you have a case to evict him. Eviction, depending on the state, may take some time, but if he refuses to live by the rental agreement, then you have grounds to evict him. I would seek out a real estate attorney, but I just consulted one recently for an issue that we have going on (we are renting during our first year here in FL). One of the things that the attorney mentioned is that if things are not clearly stated in the rental agreement, as to what goes or doesn’t go, then that is in the favor of the tenant. In your case, if you did not specifically state that he is the only one to be living there – then it might be a tougher case. Before writing the letter, I would seek the advice of a good real estate lawyer who knows rental policies of your state. Good luck–how upsetting this must be for you! I hope that this gets cleared up soon…


Thanks for responding so fast. So here’s the thing, we told him everything verbally (aside from what was published). We told him why we chose him and not another person. We said that because the other people who had called, wanted to have someone live here with them, we chose him because he was going to live ALONE. The ad does say we only wanted one person. I don’t care if he has visitors, but the girl living here is driving me crazy.

We don’t have a written agreement because he said he’d go by everything we had talked about. I work in real estate and I was going to make him sign a legal lease contract, but I never got around to doing that. The one thing I did say, since we were giving the offer of one month free if you rent before such date, that they be here at least six months, but that’s not written anywhere.

Ugh… I can’t believe I got myself in this mess. I wasn’t thinking of telling him that because I’m Catholic I don’t want those things here. I was just going to say that he isn’t quiet, he’s not the only one living there, and that he doesn’t respect the late hrs of the night nor the early hrs of the morning…

ETA: And he had the cable company install his own internet in his bedroom w/o our permission. Comcast cable had told him he couldn’t do it w/o a written permission from the owners, but because his friend works there, he got away w/o the signed note. He didn’t care we already had internet. He went and got his own so he could have his own internet and also have more tv channels in his room.


No lease, then you should be able to evict without an issue…but I’d give him 30 day notice. I would still call an attorney…but, I’m pretty sure that a verbal agreement (which can be distorted by him too, as we can see) will not be enough to keep you from evicting him. I would have a signed lease the next go round though. Hope this works out! Plz keep us posted, k?:o


The first question that I would ask is …did he sign a lease? A tenant is always supposed to reveal who will be living with him. So if she can be considered as living with him him and he didn’t declare this when he signed the lease you may have some recourse. Every state is different though I would certainly consult a lawyer without delay. Most laws are on the side of tenant for protection purposes and while he may have the right…if he signed a lease of “quite enjoyment” of his rented space…that doesn’t give him the right to be a loud and disruptive tenant. I again urge you to discuss this with a lawyer. :thumbsup:


Try this 1st tell him (verbally and in writing) that you have decided your verbal lease agreement is up and that he has 30 days to move out (don’t go into details only that the lease is up), then offer to give him back half of this months rent if he is out in 2 weeks. You’ll lose money but have your sanity back faster if he takes you up on the offer. If he is not out in a month then start the eviction process.


That is a good idea!


If this is all done verbally, just give him 30 days, and tell him to leave.

He is not respecting the terms of the verbal contract, and, from past experience, people only get worse.

It is driving you nuts, so get him out!!


I agree. You could also try to find out what the laws are around your area for evicting a tenant that does not want to leave, etc. I would not bring up being Catholic at all, it is not relevant. He is is disrupting your life regardless of his/your moral values. He does not fit with the requirements you had stated (though I do not know if you can do anything about that from a legal point of view). Just don’t mention religion, nowadays it seems like anything can turn into a religious prejudice thing.

You know, the more I think about it the more I think you should contact your city or see if you can find out more about your the laws in your area. I know tenant laws can be a pain, although I don’t know anything about laws regarding rental of a room vs a house/apt. I wouldn’t dish out any $$ for a lawyer unless really necessary, you might be able to find out all you need to find out from your city etc.


Again, thanks for the responses. I called the city and they referred me to the Housing Department. The counselor wasn’t there but the lady who answered said to me this should be easier because the guy isn’t considered a tenant since he lives in my home with us. She said she’ll get some information when the counselor comes back and will give me a call to let me know how to proceed.

Just in case, I already wrote the letter. If the Housing Dept. gives me the ok, I have it all ready to give it to him.

I hope I can finally come home and not feel angry and frustrated because of him.

lifeisbeautiful, don’t worry, I wasn’t about to mention the religion. I just mentioned it here because, as a Catholic, with good morals, I can’t stand it.

ETA: the letter, if the Housing Dept. gives me the ok to give it to him, does say he has 30 days to find another place to live. I mentioned that I’ll give him part of the money back along with his deposit if he decides to leave before the month ends.


Should you decide to look for another tenant - you might want to target your advertising. Post in your church bulletin, at local Christian colleges, get word of mouth out to friends and family…


I should’ve done that… I thought about it but didn’t do it. But after living with someone, I don’t know if I will actually dare to do it again.


This is illegal. Call Comcast and cut him off. Use this as reason to boot him. Tell him it was illegal and “rather than file a police report, you want him out” . Comcast will fire his friend too.


If his girlfriend is living there, then it’s a breach of contract on his part.

As suggested by others, give him a 30 day eviction notice if you can hold on that long. (you should really consult a lawyer if you can).

In the mean time, you can start looking for another boarder.

I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Our prayers are with you.


This is illegal. Call Comcast and cut him off. Use this as reason to boot him. Tell him it was illegal and “rather than file a police report, you want him out” . Comcast will fire his friend too.
I’ve thought about letting Comcast know, but I don’t want to cause unnecessary trouble. What bothers me more is the girl thing and the noise.

Thanks for the thought and prayers for our loss…

And yes… the gf… I don’t know if I can wait for the Housing Dept to call me back. It’s been 3 hrs already…


You shouldn’t have any problems.

He is loud late at night - my husband (who is a landlord’s agent) has kicked people out with one day’s notice, for that, because of the safety and comfort of the other tenants.

Call the Housing Department again; don’t worry about seeming like a pest. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. :wink:


Why don’t you talk with a lawyer? An initial meeting of exploration about a problem with a lawyer is inexpensive.
I have kicked out renters myself from my home, and they moved out without a problem. Of course, this person is a parasite and he may refuse to move out, so in that case too you should talk to a lawyer about precisely what to do then.


I would seek a lawyer…if you are in Florida, I can give you the name of an excellent real estate attorney who helped my dh and I recently. I think verbally asking this person to leave, will compound the problem…I think something in writing to deal with evicting him, is best. He doesn’t keep his word, obviously, and if you just go with a verbal request, he will claim that you didn’t say this or that…better to have something in writing. I’m sorry about your your loss, also–you are in my prayers.

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