I’m not really sure where to put this, or what I really need, but I’m hoping if I just rattle it off, someone can help.
When I was younger, I was very active in the Church. I was an assistant CCD teacher, in CCD myself, I occasionally did the Readings (as a middle school student, I didn’t get a regular schedule). I was always at anything the Church had, be it bingo, dinners, I was always Mary in the Christmas pageant (until someone complained, at any rate, lol). I had a lot of bad things happen in my life that caused me to doubt. I hate that I did, but I did. I even looked into other religions at one point. Well, here I am back to being Catholic. I feel at home being Catholic. But, now I’m struggling with being a better person. First off, I was married before. It was annulled by the Catholic Church, but it has kept my husband and I from having our marriage blessed. With him being in the military, it makes it difficult to find someone who will bless our marriage without putting too many restrictions. We also have two children, which makes it difficult to go to a lot of meetings. Not to mention, my husband is currently away from the Church. Things will happen that he will even vocalize that we should go back to Church because he knows it wouldn’t have happened without God’s help. My growing Faith is uncomfortable for him. Which, in turn, makes it harder for me to grow spiritually. I feel stunted in my spiritual growth.
I hope this made sense, and I hope someone has some suggestions. If you made it this far, that is.