I need to find direction and guidance

For myself and my fiancee. How would I go about finding a spiritual director, probably one that’s not a priest (for the sake of them being busy, and to be more comfortable)? We have no Catholic friends (all are Protestants), and we’re not really big on being social anyway. I’d prefer someone I could e-mail, or talk privately to just get guidance (not someone to nag me with “Have you sinned today?”). What’s your advice on this?

Praying to the Holy Spirit to give you guidance & direction in your time of need.



Even though you’re not looking for a priest as a director, having a conversation with your pastor would be a good place to start. He’s plugged into the resources of the parish and diocese and may be able to refer you to someone.

From what you’re saying, it doesn’t sound like you’re looking for traditional spiritual direction. Typically the director and directee have a set schedule, usually monthly, to talk about spiritual matters. It sounds like what you want is more on the order of someone you could call from time to time or e-mail occasionally for advice, and that’s a little different.

Perhaps there’s a deacon couple in your parish and one or both would be willing to be a kind of spiritual mentor or friend. Or maybe a couple who have been married for a long time and would be willing to talk with you. Again, your pastor would be a good resource. Make an appointment to meet with him, don’t just stop him after Mass one day.

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