My MIL has really upset DH and I and I just can’t seem to let go of my anger.
MIL has always seemed to have an issue with me. I’m not sure why. I’m a very shy, nonconfrontational type. I have always tried to be kind to her although I never really opened up to her.
When DH and I found ourselves unexpectedly expecting, she accused me of getting pregnant on purpose to trap him (we were engaged at the time). This really hurt my feelings but I moved on. She continued to put us down to her other children as we did not want to move in with her though we are poor. (I told DH my sanity was worth the price of monthly rent).
Still, I wasn’t happy about all this but I really wanted to work on our relationship as you’re stuck with your husband’s family for life! I guess I wasn’t as friendly as I could have been.
Anyways, recently DH and I announced we were having a baby shower. MIL gave me a list of 15 or so women from DH’s side of the family to invite. My Mom took a while to get the invites ready. MIL called about 2 week ago to complain that she never got an invite (shower is not until May 3rd, invitations didn’t go out until last Friday). She went on to say that we don’t want to be part of her family, that we never call her, that I’m always ignoring her, etc.
She said we were disowned and she was never speaking to us again. Later, we find out she has called every person on her side of the family who was invited to the shower and told them that we don’t care about them, we like my family more etc. Now none of them are coming to the shower even though my Mom spent time and money preparing for them.
She called DH today and told him to pick up whatever he had left in her house by Thursday. She told him if I came near the house she would make me cry.
I’m just so angry, I want to scream and throw things at her! I need to be the bigger person and try and extend the olive branch for the sake of my baby who deserves to know his grandma, but I’m just so upset and angry I never want to see her again! DH says he never wants to talk to her again too.
The anger I feel is more harmful to me than it is to her. Letting her get to me is just making me more miserable. How can I forgive this woman?