I received communion.

Last Sunday. I went to confession on Saturday and received on Sunday.
I’ve posted about this before, but I am scrupulous. I’ve been struggling with this for a long time and I feel that it’s becoming worse than ever.

So before I received the one thing I was struggling with was illegally listening to music. Not technically illegally but…listening to music on Youtube, even with reasonable certainty that the poster was not the owner.
I did not confess this becuase I felt that it was a doubtful sin. I had never really considered the immorality of listening to music on Youtube, except once when there was a thread posted about it here - I remember somebody saying that we should be charitable and assume they have the rights, so I kept on doing it, but eventually realized the problem with that is that much of the time it is really obvious that they do not have the rights. So I stopped doing it, but didn’t confess it. But I was worrying about it.

I thought that as long as I knew it was doubtful I’d be ok. I thought that once I received I could stop worrying about. I didn’t and it keeps coming back to me. How doubtful is that, really? How hard can it possibly be to put the pieces together and assume that the music is there illegally when it’s on some random’s account?

the distinction between “doubtful” and “clear” is so hazy that all I can think is that I’m worse off than before, trying to figure out just how much knowledge I had beforehand. Maybe I knew, maybe I didn’t? I can’t. I can’t even seem to distinguish between mortal or venial sins, between venial sins and imperfections, between actual sin and just? things? that? seem wrong??? I can’t even make these basic distinctions in the objective gravity of the action and now I’m supposed to figure out, in addition, how much knowledge or consent or forethought I had?

I can’t receive this week. I wish I hadn’t received last week. I thought it would bring me peace and spiritual strength but I feel so anxious and confused and my faith is weakening.

Do you have a regular confessor to guide you in dealing with your scruples? It is essential that you get some help with this. But from what you wrote here, I see no reason for you not to receive communion this week.

Please don’t beat yourself up over such things. I would recommend sitting down with a priest for an hour in his office or someplace to discuss how to help you with your scruples.

FYI, Youtube does not allow people to post music they have no rights to. People still do it, but in order to protect the copyright, youtube does one of a couple things based on what the artist wants done.

  1. the video is removed from youtube
  2. the music is removed from the video but the video stays on
    or 3 the most common one;

They insert advertisements, before or during the video. A portion of the money from those advertisements then goes to the artist who owns the music. In this way, the artist benefits greatly because his music gets passed around and he gets paid from youtube for it through ad revenue.

First of all, you need to find one spiritual director who may help.

Secondly, it’s my understanding that youtube has a legal agreement with itunes and a couple of other companies to use quite a bit of music. Why would that be a sin? I always look for that information just above the comments.

Third, please read: mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity.htm :tada:

Thanks! :thankyou:

If you are scrupulous, please, please, I pray you – stop asking your questions to the Internet. Write your concerns down in a journal and ask them all to your confessor/spiritual advisor. You will ALWAYS get conflicting/inflammatory information here, my friend. :frowning:

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