I thought I wanted to be confirmed, but now I'm not so sure


I have always been a late bloomer: I didn’t do my first communion until I was 14! However, I felt spiritually prepared and was eager to continue becoming a Catholic.

Ever since then, I’ve been wanting to be confirmed sooo badly! Unfortunately, some things kept delaying the process. I’m now in RCIA and I really like it. Except that now that zeal to become confirmed is gone. However, I still have faith- I *know *that their is a God, that He had a son, and that the Son established the Church. To me, there is no doubt about that…

…but now I’m questioning whether I really do want to get confirmed. And though generally I still want to, I don’t know why I’m questioning it.

I haven’t been able to pray about it-- I just can’t get myself to. Lately I’ve been skipping RCIA, though not because I want to, but because finals are approaching and school is becoming CRUCIAL! And last Sunday, I didn’t feel like going to mass. I seriously thought about skipping.To make matter worse, I didn’t attend mass on Monday-- which was, of course, a holy day of obligation. But I didn’t do it on purpose. I couldnt go to the mass because they were all scheduled during class time (I have three classes throughout Monday: from morning to night).

I know these are all excuses, but I don’t understand whats going on with me. I should have a sponsor by now, but am reluctant to ask the person I have in mind. I just don’t want to disappoint anyone if I decide not to go through with it…

… i dont know. Maybe this is how a bride feels when she’s going to get married?

Any help? Advice?
Prayers are greatly appreciated!
God bless and thank you!


The Sacrament of Confirmation:

Acts 8
14When the apostles in Jerusalem heard that Samaria had accepted the word of God, they sent Peter and John to them. 15When they arrived, they prayed for them that they might receive the Holy Spirit, 16because the Holy Spirit had not yet come upon any of them; they had simply been baptized into the name of the Lord Jesus. 17Then Peter and John placed their hands on them, and they received the Holy Spirit.

18When Simon saw that the Spirit was given at the laying on of the apostles’ hands, he offered them money 19and said, “Give me also this ability so that everyone on whom I lay my hands may receive the Holy Spirit.”

20Peter answered: “May your money perish with you, because you thought you could buy the gift of God with money! 21You have no part or share in this ministry, because your heart is not right before God. 22Repent of this wickedness and pray to the Lord. Perhaps he will forgive you for having such a thought in your heart. 23For I see that you are full of bitterness and captive to sin.”

24Then Simon answered, “Pray to the Lord for me so that nothing you have said may happen to me.”

25When they had testified and proclaimed the word of the Lord, Peter and John returned to Jerusalem, preaching the gospel in many Samaritan villages.

It’s free! Receive it! Receive the Holy Spirit :extrahappy:


It is better to make a decision to be confirmed than to just go through the motions. That has always been a problem with people being confirmed too young.
I tell my kids to think of it this way; When you have your 1st Communion, you become a teenager in the eyes of the church. This is your time to rebel, question and test your faith and belief systems. It is your time to grow (in knowledge, faith and reasoning). But your guardian/parent will still get you up in the morning and FROG MARCH you to Mass if need be. They are in charge.
When you CHOOSE to be confirmed, you become an Adult. You make your own decisions and choices and have the responsibility of knowing that your choices are yours alone. Taking responsibility for all your actions in sometimes a big step to make.
But since your faith is not in question, just a bit of laziness and prioritising problems; get confirmed. Good luck - its better to be an informed Catholic than a “going through the motions” one! Good luck! .:thumbsup:


in the first place it is the bishop who confirms your Christian initiation, it is not you who “confirms” your parents’ or your decision to be baptized. That change in perspective may help you look at your situation. To reject confirmation when you are invited is to reject your Christian initiation, to refuse to ask for the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and for the unfolding of his gifts within you. That is a major rejection.

Zeal, enthusiasm and other subjective emotions are clues but never by themselves a valid indication of your true spiritual condition. All that is necessary is that you request confirmation from the bishop and desire the fullness of life in the Church, with the Father in Christ through the Holy Spirit.

As for the reason you are questioning your readiness, that is a natural state, which most candidates go through at some time. Bear in mind Satan does not want this, does not want you faithful, does not want you Catholic and does not want you united with the Holy Trinity, so the more fervent you become the more he will attack. Bear in mind also that the very remedy against these attacks is the sacrament of confirmation, whose original purpose was strengthening the candidate to withstand persecution, which was a given in the early Church.


I ask the Holy Spirit to please fill and inspire you.


Try to spend some time before the Blessed Sacrament. Lay the confusion etc before God , give it to him and aks him to set things right.

Go to confession re missing Mass on Monday and losing your focus on God.My 16 year old daughte missed two AP classes in order to go to Mass. I work at a public college where the professors will forgive the absence for HDO’s or they remind their students to use their absences for those days. Get in the habit of setting time apart for prayer. Doesn’t have to be long. 5 minutes on your knees when you get up and when you go to bed. Or if you are really pressed for time pray in shower, where ever.Extend it when you grow a bit.

It’s well know that converts and adults who are seeking closer relationships with God and the Church come under attack with doubts and difficulties. The evil one doesn’t want you to get closer with God so he works overtime tempting you especially if he recognizes the potential for you to be a great Christian.

Start praying the St. Michael Prayer, go to a Catholic bookstore or order a cheapo medal online and then ask your priest to bless it. Print the prayer off the internet if you don’t have it in a book. Get a prayer to the Holy Spirit. Remember you already received the Holy Spirit and you have his gifts buried inside you. You can start connecting with that now.

Saint Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil; may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. O Prince of the heavenly host, by the power of God, thrust into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who wander through the world for ruin of souls. Amen.

Come Holy Spirit, and fill the hearts of your faithful, and kindle in them the fire of Your Divine Love. Send forth Your Spirit and they shall be created, and You shall renew the face of the earth. Oh God, Who by the light of the Holy Spirit instructed the hearts of the faithful, Grant, that by the same Spirit we may be truly wise and ever rejoice in His consolation. We ask this through Christ Our Lord. Amen.

You can find others you might like here-


You are not the first person to experience these difficulties and you won’t be the last.

Praying for you .


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