I want some peace of mind


My ex boyfriend and I met in a very unusual way. We met in a chartroom. Our first talk involved sexual things and we usually do this everyday. When we decided to meet we stayed in their house and we did it. I am a catholic all through out my life. I’ve studied in a catholic school, pray the rosary and go to church every Sunday. I do pray always. This guy is my first boyfriend and he is the only man I’ve ever done this with. We met when I was 29 he was 22. I know it is a very long age gap but at that time it didn’t bother us. After two months from our first chat he became my boyfriend. IT was a very physical/ intimate relationship for us. But I know in my heart when I decided to do it with him I made a decision that he is the one for me. I love him so much with all my heart that things I never imagined doing before I have done it all for him. I’ve sacrificed too much of myself for him. I’ve accepted everything about him. He has a love child with his previous relationship. I’ve swallowed all the insults and anger by the mother of his lovechild. I was asking him if I am the caused of their breakup but he said their relationship has been way over when I came into the picture. And so I believed him. We’ve been together for two years. I thought he was happy with me. But suddenly he just told me straight to my face he doesn’t love me anymore. He has found another girl and that girl is his happiness now. He said when we become intimate in these past days of our relationship it was all hormones for him. He just doesn’t love me anymore. It didn’t last. He said that this time he wants to find love not just physical relationship. All the hurtful things he said it to me. But I accepted it all and even begged for him to give me a second chance. He said no. He broke up with me nov 7 and he got his new gf nov 28. I even talked to the girl to introduce myself to her because she doesn’t have any idea that I was in the girlfriend we were having some problems because of her. I was in a temporary insanity at that time. I would fight the girl and even my ex. I would like him to see my reasons. I want them to feel the guilt for hurting me this so much. I even asked the girl to please stay away from him so we could work things out. But the girl doesn’t care at all and even my ex. He didn’t give me any importance. The two years we had was just nothing to him. I was really fighting for what I believe is right because I know he cheated on me.
I know it’s been almost 2 months since we broke up. But the thing is do still love him very much even after what happened. My friends and family are saying to let it go. That he’s not the right man for me but why I still love him this way. Why do I still feel the connection between us? Even my ex told me this. HE said that it is only me who could give him that kind of love. He even said that in time he knows that he will regret everything he had done to me and there might come a time that he will come back to me and begging to accept him. Everyhting he says I still believe him. This kind of thing gives me hope. My mother told me to never talk to him or chat with him anymore. But I can’t stop myself. I am the one who would text him or chat him first. From the very beginning of our relationship Ive asked God’s guidance and forgiveness. And after what happened to us Ive always ask God to give me strength, to heal my heart, to give me peace of mind. But still I feel the pain. I can’t stop it. Until now imstill crying whenever I think of them or something would remind me of him. I just want to move on. I even pray to God to let my ex realize what he has done. To make him feel that it is him who has lost something not me. I am praying to Him to never let my ex forget me. Are this vengeance? I really don’t know anymore. I know that God is the source of my happiness but I am still lonely. I feel alone.


I am so sorry for your grief and suffering. I see how very difficult it is for you, and pray that God will give you freedom, healing, and the true happiness He desires for you. :hug1:

Dearest Jesus please help this poor girl to realise this relationship and her bondage to it is very destructive to her. This man is selfish and insensitive and a life with him would end up to be emotional hell and he will never remain faithful as he only really cares about himself. Even the words of hope he gives her are cruel and selfish.
Jesus this relationship began with talk about sex, which isn’t a good place for a Catholic relationship to begin and it launched into premarital sex which is against the gospel and the teachings of the church. It may have seemed fun and satisfying but this was a false joy. Please free this poor young woman from this destructive attachment. Please help her realise he is needful of her prayer but that her attachment to him is obsession and attraction, not love. It only seems to her to be love.

Please save this girl, Father, in the name of Jesus.

I ask Jesus to comfort and heal you.
Kindly, Trishie


Will pray for you to get over this relationship and find peace. Stay close to God and keep praying for guidance and strength. Listen to your Mother, she knows what’s good for you, stay close to your family too…


Thank you very much for your prayers…I really need it…how many times Ive told myself to surrender everything to God but temptations are still there.I know in my heart God will not abondone me.He has a greater plan for me. But I need prayers to help me in trusting the Lord. Thank you again…


:frowning: Praying you’ll find peace.


Continuing prayers for you…


Chinup pinktoes, you WILL get over this. At some point in the future I think you will be with your true love and will not remember what you saw in this guy in the first place.
I get the heebie jeebies when I remember some of the girls who broke my heart. I thank God I didn’t wind up with them.
Pray, my dear, and it will get better.
And I will pray for you too!


thank youall for your prayers… Merry Christmas to all… :slight_smile:


Praying for your happiness!


Praying for you, I’m in the same boat so don’t feel alone!


I pray that you find peace and strength.


Merry Christmas and Peace be with you!


thank you all for the prayers…my ex greeted me last nigth. iim that told him that the ties that binds should broken. He said there are too many ties to be broken… and so this melted my heart again. but the next day we chatted again and he told me he really love this new girl and he felt like its forever with her. what i dont understand with him why does he have to play with my feelings. its like he wants me just to be there for him… like when he needed me he just want me to there for him. i told him i dont want to be used again by him. ive realized that God has a better plan for me and He will not leave me. please continnue pray for my healing. im still hurting. i want temptations from him to be stop. I am asking strength from God to give me. I want to change for God. and i want to feel the Happiness and Love that God is giving me…thank you all…


I pray the Lord helps you to continue to think clearly, as he has told you the bonds which bind you are too many to be broken, yet he has admitted that the only bonds in your relationship were sex…therefore it is only sex that binds from his side but he’d like to keep you on a string. May the Lord help you to understand that even if he were to take you back, till the next girl takes his fancy, it would be uncharitable to yourself to accept him back.
I thank God for the gift of self-preservation and sense of self that you are beginning to claim…and I pray that you will find a man truly worthy of your love. God bless you.


Praying very hard for the Holy Spirit to guide you!


There are big glaring signs to those of us on the outside looking in. I know it’s hard to see it from where you are, but you need to move on and in a hurry.
Might I suggest that the next time he contacts you that you tell him he had his chance and blew it.
I don’t think you could ever trust this guy in any relationship.
There’s an old song you are probably too young to remember:
"These boots are made for walking…"
Get to walking girl, and move on.
You will be much better in the long run.
And I will pray that the hurt stops soon.


I am feeling much better now…although sometimes i get to think of him and the girl and i would feel the pain again…thank you all again for the prayers. I am feeling God’s grace is with me. I may not fully understand HIs plans for me but I am trusting Him so much. I am asking to please continue praying for me. I will be taking my NCLEX exam on march and I would like to focus my mind on my review… I dont want any temptations from him again… I am praying to givee me strength so I could overcame all of these…I thank you all. I am so glad that i found out about this website…I was so low and in despair before but now with all your prayers I know God is with me… thank you…:slight_smile:


EVERYONE needs to be on guard - a lot of guys will say ANYTHING to get a girl “in the sack”.


I want to thank you continuing praying for me…I God is providing me strength to fight away the temptations…My ex texted me again yesterday telling me that he was wrong and i am right…and he asked for us to still have an open commmunication. Yesterday i said yes to him but told i cant still give the friendship he asking from me cause i can still the pain. But early this morning…i made a decision to stop it all… i told him that when he said he doesnt love me anymore.he has broken a lot of ties between us… and i did let go of him but it seems like he was the one who cant let go me…so i told him that we just have to enjoy what we have now without having each other in our lives…that maybe in time we could be friends again but not now. that i dont need him anymore also.and i even asked him delete all the traces of me in his email and friendster account…I know there is still heaviness that i can feel inside of me…But God gave me this strength so I could all do this… to really decicde to cut off between us… Thank you God…


DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.