where do people who abstain and live a celibate life fit in? Do they not have an identity?
I contest the point that society teaches that. It is often claimed, but I have yet to see proof of it.
That being said, celibates fit in with all the rest of the single people. If they just don’t talk about their sex-life (or lack of one) then no one will notice.
Sexual identity plays an important role in most people’s lives although not all. Nonetheless, it is far from one’s only identity. People identify themselves in terms of their cultural roots, citizenship, state and city in which they live, religion, race (even though anthropologists tell us this is a fictitious concept), socioeconomic class, gender, profession, personality, interests and hobbies, and in several other ways. So even if society may say you are your sexual identity (which is debatable), everyone has many other means of identifying themselves.
Society labels people in all different type of ways, not just by our sexual identity.
If *society *teaches anything … I try hard not to listen to what *society *teaches.
*Society *teaches that abortion is OK, *society *teaches that sex outside of marriage is OK, *society *teaches that contraception is OK. :tsktsk:
Sexual identity plays an important role in most people’s lives although not all. Nonetheless, it is far from one’s only identity.
The problem with this is main stream society, entertainment and media pumps into the minds of the young or low informed that indeed ones sexual identity is very important, and there is not enough being mentioned to the contrary. Or possibly on a family level we as a people are not educating ourselves enough to know better and then in turn teach our children that a sexual identity is not the most important aspect of ones identity.
If they just don’t talk about their sex-life (or lack of one) then no one will notice.
As true as that is , it should not be so. I have found more often than not, to talk about ones sex life besides being a personal matter, is probably due to embarressment or fear of being an outcast or ridiculed. Considering how young males and females are from teens to mid 20s. It is easier to " fit in " an be accepted than speak from the heart and stand for what one believes and be mocked for it. Thus one is faced on how to teach another young person on why not having a casual sex life is good and respectable and how to be able to value ones self for that decision if challenged on it and to not feel ashamed or embarressed.
This is always the response that I have, yet people insist on the contrary. “I am a gay man and proud”, for example. What if that gay man was also a doctor? We’d never know it because his sexuality determines his identification.
Or a heterosexual that gets a lot of girls. “He’s successful. A player.”
Usually people see celibates as “losers.” Is this really their identity?
I don’t know your approximate age group, but I can tell you from experience that as you get older, you begin to care less what “other people” think. Define yourself first and don’t be overly concerned about what others may say. If you don’t think you’re a loser, it doesn’t really matter what others think. Besides, most people are too preoccupied with their own affairs to pay much attention to you.
If I’m not mistaken you are a teen, correct? Most kids in high school identify with what they do. For instance, when I was in high school I was labled as a jock. Playing sports wasn’t the ONLY thing I did. I also had good grades and was in different community service clubs, but kids outside of the jock group didn’t care about the other things I did, only that I was a jock. I learned that being an athlete was my identifier. I’m sure these kids who say, “I’m gay and proud,” say that because they have been put into that gay group and being gay is their high school identifier.
Once you get out of college, no one cares about what you do sexually. Unless the person is a super close to me, I wouldn’t know if they were having sex or not. I don’t care to know about their sex life and they don’t care about mine. Regardless of sexual orientation.