This might kind of be an old question. If there are two beds, is it okay to sleep in the same room? What about only one bed? Is the most heroic thing for a guy to do sleep in the car? Thanks.
Watch the old movie, It happened One Night.
Yes, I was going to say something about that. I saw it, but I don’t know if what they did was right. However, let’s keep the discussion focused not on the movie but the original question. Thanks for the reply.
I would suggest not getting into this predicament. Don’t travel with a non-relative of the opposite sex unless you know you can find separate hotel rooms.
Who are you, who is she, and why are you traveling together?
Well, one could sleep on the floor or you both could sleep head-to-toe… with your backs turned?
P.S. - You’re full of questions today, huh!
Let her sleep in the room, while you sleep in the car.
If there is only one bed, bring along your sleeping bag and sleep on the floor. Better yet if you can string up a sheet across the room to give the girl some privacy. If there is any chance that either of you might be tempted toward something improper, go sleep in the car. But it’s best not to get into this predicament in the first place.
just a female friend or “girlfriend”?
This isn’t a real situtation for me. It is only hypothetical. I’m wondering what the answer is. Is it okay to sleep in the same room or even the same bed?
When travelling with a priest, we always got a two-bedroom motel room, and if we couldn’t get that, either us two girls or Father would sleep in the sitting room. (Separate apartments were out of range of our budget.)
Interestingly enough, it is the cheaper motels that offer walled rooms - the more expensive places are “open plan” with no wall between the sitting room and the bedroom.
So, yeah - stop at a really cheap motel and one of you can sleep on a cot in the sitting room. (Being a perfect gentleman, of course that would be you. )
Do what John Lennon did with that Norweigan girl…crawl up to sleep in the bath, and hope she hasn’t flown by the morning.
Seriously, though, some rules…
- Unmarried and unrelated members of the opposite sex should never ever sleep in the same bed, regardless of the circumstances. Even if you are technically doing nothing sexual, as a man, you have a responsibility to protect her honor and integrity, and the potential implications of your actions would fail to do so.
- Your car is always an option. Be a gentleman and let her take the hotel room.
- In the case of someone you don’t know very well, she may claim that you tried to do something to her, even if you didn’t, so you are best off avoiding even the same hotel room.
- If she is your girlfriend, be sure that YOU notify HER parents of what is going on, so that you establish trust with them.
- Never get yourself into such a predicament in the first place.
Maybe ask her husband or boyfriend what you should do. That’ll solve your dilemma.
Why would you consider two good friends sleeping in the same bed immoral? I’m not questioning your reasons, just wondering why.
Assuming the situation was that the guy and girl were really really good friends and there wasn’t a chance of them “doing” anything because of that friendship. I can totally see your resposes holding true if the guy and girl were in a relationship or didn’t know each other super well…even in my secular opinion I would expect the guy to offer to take the floor at the very least in those situations. I wouldn’t think twice of sharing the same bed with my best guy buddy though…it would be like sharing with my brother and for him it would be like sharing with his sister. Help me understand why you would consider that wrong…
Because of how it would look, to others. Even people who know the two quite well would think something was up if they were sharing a bed together.
We have a moral duty not only to do the right thing in actuality, but also to set a good example for others, which means that we should avoid doing anything that might appear to be evil - especially if we are churchgoing people, since one of the main reasons non-churchgoers give for not coming to Church is “all that hypocrisy,” meaning that they are watching us, to see what we do, and judging us accordingly. Of course you can always explain it to those who ask, but if there is no good reason for it (and there is almost never a good reason for a man to sleep in the same bed with a woman - where there is a bed, there is also usually a blanket, a pillow, and a floor), why set the tongues to wagging, in the first place?
I agree with your list, except for the “your car is always an option” comment. If it’s 10-below outside, I wouldn’t recommend it. Just thought I would throw a technicality in there.
I would definitely try to avoid the situation by planning ahead and/or just not travelling with someone of the opposite sex who is not my wife, my mother, or one of my daughters.
Good grief. I would NEVER consider this. Neither would any priest I know.
Why would a priest and 2 girls be traveling together? I suppose if one girl is his sister, they might share a room, but not w/ any other girl. —KCT
Years ago, one of my closest friends was girl… we went to Europe twice (7 countries the first time, 4 the second) and Asia once (2 countries)…
We always shared a room to cut costs, sometimes sharing a bed, sometimes the rooms had double beds… but it wasn’t a big deal because she was and is like a sister.
We’v never had anything more than a friendship,
Anyone who finds scandal with that, whatever… its weird in my mind your mind works in such a filthy way AND its a shame you haven’t shared a close platonic friendship with a member of the opposite sex and that you couldn’t do so without scandal or temptation. Your scandal says more about you than it says about me.
I saw an episode of “Happy Days” where such an occurrence happened. Joanie and Chachi (boyfriend & girlfriend) had to share a room and were concerned about the scandal. They slept in the bed with one foot on the floor each so that way nothing would have happened.
Now, my opinion is that it was an interesting idea. But it didn’t seem to deal with the “how it appears to others” issue.
The how it appears issue is a non issue. If you live your life in constant wonderment of how every action you make affects others, i guarantee you you’ll make some therapist rich one day.
people see scandal where there is none, and as for the normal folks, we can’t dumb down everything we do because someone elses skewed or perverse thinking will run with it in the wrong direction.
If someone wants to live their life for the sake of others emotions, i think thats a misuse of a human life.