Im 15, Never Kissed a girl or touched, should i become a priest?


#1

i do wanna date or get married but, the bible says its good for a man to get married but its even better for a man to never touch a woman, if god wants me to abstain from sexuality itself, i will though. i'm going to confession saturday, i've thought about becoming a priest but, im 15 could i ? but i wanna date at least once or marry i dont know if i can take a vow of celibacy .. i wanna at least have a 1st kiss like everybody else.. i've barely even talked to girls but i wanna be that better & never touch a woman but i wanna get married & be a father one day .. i want to abstain from sexuality itself but i wanna get married or date ... i really dont know is it God giving me these thoughts? i really dont know im praying to god to let his will be done on me, i'm crying now because i dont wanna touch a woman but i wanna get married too.. i really dont know if i could be a priest, :(


#2

im so lost i really dont know if i can though i do wanna get married but i really dont know if i could take a vow of celibacy i wanna at least kiss a girl once, but that'll never happend i dont know really couldn't i live a life of chastity ? i can wait till im married, Yes i dont know really am i too young to think about this? god knows i wanna date a girl at least once, i'm just gonna let it be Gods will but, im so lost


#3

[quote="i_need_helpp, post:1, topic:202328"]
i do wanna date or get married but, the bible says its good for a man to get married but its even better for a man to never touch a woman, if god wants me to abstain from sexuality itself, i will though. i'm going to confession saturday, i've thought about becoming a priest but, im 15 could i ? but i wanna date at least once or marry i dont know if i can take a vow of celibacy .. i wanna at least have a 1st kiss like everybody else.. i've barely even talked to girls but i wanna be that better & never touch a woman but i wanna get married & be a father one day .. i want to abstain from sexuality itself but i wanna get married or date ... i really dont know is it God giving me these thoughts? i really dont know im praying to god to let his will be done on me, i'm crying now because i dont wanna touch a woman but i wanna get married too.. i really dont know if i could be a priest, :(

[/quote]

It is possible for you to become a priest after high school, college (should that be the direction that you go) and seminary. You still have many years in front of you before you would be able to take your vows and thus become a priest. During that time, pray and be open to God and His will. He'll guide you in the direction that He wants you to go in. Additionally, if you do go to seminary, you will have a Spiritual Director to help you with your discernment. In the mean time, ask your parents for their support and speak with your priest about your discernment. Perhaps ask father for the name of your diocese vocation director and speak with him concerning your path. Go to mass as often as possible; get involved with activities at your parish (especially programs like Room at the Inn, Outreach to the Poor, and other charitable activities). Turn to our Mother Mary for help in your discernment. While doing this, be open to the possibility that the priesthood is not necessarily God’s plan for you. Without husbands and fathers, priest would have no one to administer the sacraments to. God bless and God be with you on your journey into discernment. :thumbsup:


#4

I would say to you this "Don't worry!" :)

I'm 25 years old, I'm only newly Catholic (about two months) and I've never had a serious relationship or even kissed a girl yet. Among protestants (which I was for 25 years) just about everyone is more or less expected to get married, but I was (and still am) without a relationship. There is a young woman I'm interested in very seriously, but I'm also beginning to consider the priesthood. I don't know yet, but God is very good at making these things clear to us. All of the advice given above is excellent and I would recommend following it. Don't worry, really! The fact that you're 15 and never kissed a girl is actually rather awesome if you ask me. It means that you've managed to remain pure in any relationship you have with girls at school or youth group or wherever else you may encounter them. That is wonderful! So many your age (or even younger) fall into sin and impurity these days and it is wonderful that there are some who manage to maintain purity!

Pray to God to enlighten the eyes of your heart, ask for the intercession of the Blessed Mother (she's a good Mama!) and trust God to guide your steps. Both the priesthood and married life are wonderful vocations and God will show you which way to go. As I said, all the advice above is wonderful and I would say follow it. But most of all, don't worry about it! It will all become clear in time. You have many years ahead and plenty of time to discern. I know it doesn't seem that way right now, but you really do.

I'll pray for you!


#5

[quote="i_need_helpp, post:2, topic:202328"]
im so lost i really dont know if i can though i do wanna get married but i really dont know if i could take a vow of celibacy i wanna at least kiss a girl once, but that'll never happend i dont know really couldn't i live a life of chastity ? i can wait till im married, Yes i dont know really am i too young to think about this? god knows i wanna date a girl at least once, i'm just gonna let it be Gods will but, im so lost

[/quote]

You don't have to make a choice now, you still have high school, plus whatever the requirements are for going to a seminary(university/college) in you diocese, think on it yes, it is a very important choice. But obviously you shouldn't exclude the possibly that God could be calling you to the Married life as well. The best thing you could do is talk to your priest, tell him about what your feeling and he can give you advice, better advice than what we can give you on CAF.


#6

You should become a priest if you feel called to do so. Only God can answer this question for you. The point is that you should pray, listen, and ponder the answer that God gives you. If you are living the way that you say you are you will be able to hear what God has in store for you.

By the way my daughter is 15 and she has never kissed or touched a guy...I don't think she has any plans to become a nun right now...

Just continue your life of virtue and may God Bless You:)


#7

You are very young and you have plenty of time to kiss a girl and decided if you want to be a priest.

Here's what my husband said to our sons when they were your age and fearful that life was passing them by. He told them to take whatever they were hearing from the guys in the locker room with a grain of salt because it wasn't happening. It was all talk in his time and it was all talk in their time. Each thanked him profusely. Like you, they too were worried that they weren't attractive etc.

Girls too wonder about the same thing.


#8

I'm 20, and I've never dated anybody. It's more normal than I originally thought I was. When I was in high school I thought there was something wrong with me! But now I am so glad I never dated, let alone kissed, anybody. It is really a blessing. In our day and age, when kids as young as the 5th grade are dating, it's really a gift to have escaped the vapid world of dating done the wrong way!

I am also discerning religious vocation, but I still need to continue discerning with my spiritual director. You still have time, but continue to pray and grow in your relationship with God. Through becoming a better Christian daily, you will be more able to see what God wants you to do. Pray, fast (giving up good, though unnecessary, things especially), read, and seek guidance from prayerful people.

Maybe this link might help you understand more. It helped me : religious-vocation.com/discerning_religious_vocation.html

May Mary be with you :)


#9

You're only 15. It's way too soon to be worrying about this, either way.


#10

Being 15, not ever dated or kissed a girl, is perfectly normal. I would bet if most people your age would answer honestly when asked about if they even enjoyed dating, many of them would say they only dated because everyone else has a boyfriend/girlfriend. I know my niece just went through that experience.

Take your time, even waiting to date until after college is not the dumbest thing to do. Take the pressure off yourself to experience kissing a girl and focus more on developing quality friendships with all types of people and I would suspect that the opportunity to date a girl will present itself.


#11

Let me tell you, when you think of kissing that way, its way too overrated when it becomes a reality. Mellow out for now and just enjoy being single and having this time to yourself to be educated and grow. I have friends who have girls that are trying to get through school and it only makes it difficult on them. The brain, believe it or not, is not fully developed to around age 25. This means until then you are still developing a personality and though some stay constant most of your likes and interests are still changing.

Vocation is a serious matter. Don't look at is as "well I haven't any luck with this one, better try the other". Now is the best time to learn about the religious and married lives and start seeing where you would like to be. And if that decision needs to wait several years, let it.


#12

Dude. I"m 16 and I've never kissed a girl or had a girlfriend. I was considering the Preisthood too, but not for that reason. I considered it because I thought God might be calling me.

I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. God will work it out.


#13

I had similar thoughts to yours during my own discernment. My best advice is to find a spiritual director (not just in confession--ask a priest you trust about spiritual direction; he will explain to you what that is) to guide you in your discernment. If you are familiar with priests of the Fraternity of St. Peter or the Institute of Christ the King, I highly recommend them.

Those who go to the seminary do not do so because they aren't attracted to women. Your desire to be married is natural, and all men experience it to some degree or another (except, perhaps, by a special grace of God); it doesn't mean you necessarily are called to be married. As you said, it is better not to touch a woman, and the priestly or religious vocation is a greater vocation than marriage (though only, of course, if one is actually called to it by God). While you are in a good state (because it is ridiculous to "date" before you have a prospect actually to be married) being free from intimate relationships with women, I highly encourage you to continue as you are until you've thoroughly discerned your vocation. This is your first duty towards God. Without doing this, you will constantly hear in your ear the admonition of St. Augustine: Bene curres sed extra viam (You run well but out of the way).

If you do not seriously discern your vocation, you will be at risk of losing your soul, for if we err in this one choice, everything we do will be wrong. We can do 1,000 acts of charity and spend all our time in prayer, but if we do it not according to God's will, it is worthless. It is rather a heap of burning coals upon our head. I encourage you, then, to spend time in prayer discerning this--quite, meditative prayer (there is a thread in the Traditionalist forum right now about this topic, if you are unfamiliar with it). Speak to a priest knowledgeable in the ways of God, and he will guide you. One thing I can tell you for sure. It is never, never a mistake to go to the seminary if you go in good will. Whether you stay or leave, it is always worth the effort. You will grow immeasurably more than you can ever imagine in every way. One person mentioned college. If you think you have a vocation, don't go to college. You will almost certainly lose your vocation. You can learn anything you learn that is worthwhile in college while at the seminary. I will keep your discernment in my prayers. God bless.


#14

[quote="IntegraCatholic, post:13, topic:202328"]
One person mentioned college. If you think you have a vocation, don't go to college. You will almost certainly lose your vocation. You can learn anything you learn that is worthwhile in college while at the seminary. I will keep your discernment in my prayers. God bless.

[/quote]

I just want to comment on this part. A seminarian, of course, must first complete college before going on to study theology. It may be a college seminary or a Catholic college or a secular college.

In my own diocese, we have many seminarians who enter theology after first having attended a secular college and even after having worked in various other professions. Their vocations were not endangered. One man was non-Catholic, but converted to Catholicism while attending a state university. He attended the university Newman Center. At some point of graduating from college, he decided to enter seminary. He is now a bishop.

My own recommendation would be to finish school, finish college, work at a job or jobs for awhile, before discerning your life's direction.


#15

The exception proves the rule. All spiritual authors will tell you that your vocation is something you must put into practice as soon as possible after discerning that it is your state in life.


#16

At 15 Year old you shouldn't have "experience" with girls. You should not use priesthood to escape an aversion that you may be having now. You should be listening for a calling. This is what you should respond to.


#17

http://forums.catholic.com/images/icons/icon14.gifhttp://forums.catholic.com/images/icons/icon14.gifhttp://forums.catholic.com/images/icons/icon14.gif
I'm really surprised to find out that there are still people whom believe that virginity before marriage is very important, you really give a good example of Christian faith, may GOD bless you all and may GOD protect you against all evil works.


#18

[quote="IntegraCatholic, post:13, topic:202328"]
If you do not seriously discern your vocation, you will be at risk of losing your soul, for if we err in this one choice, everything we do will be wrong. We can do 1,000 acts of charity and spend all our time in prayer, but if we do it not according to God's will, it is worthless. It is rather a heap of burning coals upon our head.

[/quote]

Uhm, no. If you have trouble discerning your vocation, and perhaps misunderstand or pick incorrectly, God does not walk away from you never to speak to you again.

One person mentioned college. If you think you have a vocation, don't go to college. You will almost certainly lose your vocation. You can learn anything you learn that is worthwhile in college while at the seminary. I will keep your discernment in my prayers. God bless.

Vocations are not so fragile that they do not survive living in the real world.

We need priests who are normal, who have lived life, and who are making an informed decision knowing what they are giving up and what they are getting in to.

So, while you are thinking about your vocation, live life. Whether it's marriage or the religious life, go into it with your eyes and ears open. At 15, you just need to pray about it. Read some books. Talk to the vocations director of your diocese.


#19

Right now you just need to be praying for chastity. Everything else will work out in time.


#20

PaulinVA, both of the opinions I expressed are the common consensus of moral theologians and spiritual authors (especially the second one; it is unanimous, in fact, in all those I have read--at least a dozen, probably many more). Do you have a source for what you are saying other than your personal opinion, which, if I may say so, seems to be guided more by what is considered "normal" by the modern world than by sound principles?


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