I'm beginning to dread going to Sunday Mass


#1

My wife is a type-2 diabetic. She has just started taking a new medication which must be injected after she gets up and before she eats anything. On Sunday mornings she wants to sleep until an hour before we leave, which gives her just enough time to get ready, including injecting herself, and then she drinks a Slimfast on the way to church.

One of this med's side effects is nausea, and my wife has been getting that in spades. So she's miserable during Mass, sitting there trying not to throw up, and she's not one for hiding it well when she's not comfortable. That makes me miserable because I know she's miserable, and it's making my Sunday Mass experience a completely negative one. When we leave, my back is tied in knots from the tension (I can't blame the pews; I also go to weekday Masses, and I have no back pain after those.).

I have suggested getting up earlier and actually eating some solid food, but I don't know whether or not she will consider getting up earlier to do that. I don't want to start going to separate Masses, but once in a while I would like to have a Mass experience that I didn't have to offer up as personal suffering.

What I need is for someone to give me a quick kick in the zadnitsa and tell me to straighten up. Any volunteers?


#2

[quote="DaveBj, post:1, topic:320162"]
My wife is a type-2 diabetic. She has just started taking a new medication which must be injected after she gets up and before she eats anything. On Sunday mornings she wants to sleep until an hour before we leave, which gives her just enough time to get ready, including injecting herself, and then she drinks a Slimfast on the way to church.

One of this med's side effects is nausea, and my wife has been getting that in spades. So she's miserable during Mass, sitting there trying not to throw up, and she's not one for hiding it well when she's not comfortable. That makes me miserable because I know she's miserable, and it's making my Sunday Mass experience a completely negative one. When we leave, my back is tied in knots from the tension (I can't blame the pews; I also go to weekday Masses, and I have no back pain after those.).

I have suggested getting up earlier and actually eating some solid food, but I don't know whether or not she will consider getting up earlier to do that. I don't want to start going to separate Masses, but once in a while I would like to have a Mass experience that I didn't have to offer up as personal suffering.

What I need is for someone to give me a quick kick in the zadnitsa and tell me to straighten up. Any volunteers?

[/quote]

  1. Is there a later Mass at another parish you both can attend, after you've both eaten something?
  2. Can your wife's health be sufficiently bad that she can actually be dispensed from the Mass obligation? You may want to raise this with your pastor.
  3. Can she actually munch on something (discreetly of course) during Mass to keep her strength up?

Why must the status quo be maintained if it doesn't work for the both of you?


#3

[quote="porthos11, post:2, topic:320162"]
1. Is there a later Mass at another parish you both can attend, after you've both eaten something?
2. Can your wife's health be sufficiently bad that she can actually be dispensed from the Mass obligation? You may want to raise this with your pastor.
3. Can she actually munch on something (discreetly of course) during Mass to keep her strength up?

Why must the status quo be maintained if it doesn't work for the both of you?

[/quote]

  1. This is the 11:00 Mass, the last of the English-language Masses. There is a 7:30 p.m. Hispanic Mass that my wife occasionally attends, but since I have to get up early Monday morning, I prefer to keep my Sunday evenings free. I usually get up at 7:00 (my job hours make me a habitual early riser), and I make myself a southern fried breakfast, but she won't eat what I cook on Sunday mornings.
  2. It's possible, but I don't think my wife would go for that. She's not looking for excuses to miss Mass.
  3. Given that by the time we get to church she's already nauseated, I think that eating something would be counterproductive.

#4

[quote="DaveBj, post:1, topic:320162"]
My wife is a type-2 diabetic. She has just started taking a new medication which must be injected after she gets up and before she eats anything. On Sunday mornings she wants to sleep until an hour before we leave, which gives her just enough time to get ready, including injecting herself, and then she drinks a Slimfast on the way to church.

One of this med's side effects is nausea, and my wife has been getting that in spades. So she's miserable during Mass, sitting there trying not to throw up, and she's not one for hiding it well when she's not comfortable. That makes me miserable because I know she's miserable, and it's making my Sunday Mass experience a completely negative one. When we leave, my back is tied in knots from the tension (I can't blame the pews; I also go to weekday Masses, and I have no back pain after those.).

I have suggested getting up earlier and actually eating some solid food, but I don't know whether or not she will consider getting up earlier to do that. I don't want to start going to separate Masses, but once in a while I would like to have a Mass experience that I didn't have to offer up as personal suffering.

What I need is for someone to give me a quick kick in the zadnitsa and tell me to straighten up. Any volunteers?

[/quote]

It seems to me that, if she is getting nausea so much, she should go back to the doctor and ask for a different medicine.

Your wife also needs to adjust her thinking about when she will get up - obviously, if she gets up so late, getting ready is all a rush, and, on top of that, she is dealing with side effects? I wouldn't blame you if she doesn't do something about this. Go back to the doctor, and also adjust the time she gets up on Sunday. I'd be mad at my husband (he has type II diabetes, too) if he was handling things the way your wife is! We frequently need to adjust our routine if it interferes with a peaceful life.


#5

[quote="Joan_M, post:4, topic:320162"]
It seems to me that, if she is getting nausea so much, she should go back to the doctor and ask for a different medicine.

Your wife also needs to adjust her thinking about when she will get up - obviously, if she gets up so late, getting ready is all a rush, and, on top of that, she is dealing with side effects? I wouldn't blame you if she doesn't do something about this. Go back to the doctor, and also adjust the time she gets up on Sunday. I'd be mad at my husband (he has type II diabetes, too) if he was handling things the way your wife is! We frequently need to adjust our routine if it interferes with a peaceful life.

[/quote]

I've given up fighting with her about her hours. She typically stays up watching TV until 1-2:00 a.m. and then sleeps until noon or later, so 10:15 on Sunday mornings actually makes a short night for her.

With regard to changing the medication, the thing is that this is the first medication that's effectively dealing with her blood sugar numbers.


#6

Why not go to the Saturday vigil Mass?


#7

Are you sure the Slimfast isn't contributing to her nausea??

That stuff has tons of additives that would make me gag...and also, it's high in processed sugar (I thought maybe a diabetic tries to stay away from that?) and artificial sweeteners and chemicals...

If she can only handle liquid at that time of day, she might be better off having a good, solid protein shake---protein powder from the health food store mixed up with banana or other fruit in the blender...it's low in sugar, high in protein, and pure in ingredients.

Here's what's in that Slimfast--I wouldn't go near it myself...:

MALTODEXTRIN, SUGAR, COCOA (PROCESSED WITH ALKALI), GUM ARABIC, HIGH OLEIC SUNFLOWER OIL, CELLULOSE GEL, MILK PROTEIN CONCENTRATE, BUTTERMILK POWDER,SOY LECITHIN, XANTHAN GUM, ARTIFICIAL FLAVOR, SODIUM PHOSPHATE, DEXTROSE, CARRAGEENAN, SALT, MODIFIED CORN STARCH, POTASSIUM PHOSPHATE, GUAR GUM, ACESULFAME POTASSIUM (NONNUTRITIVE SWEETENER), ASPARTAME. VITAMINS AND MINERALS: CALCIUM CARBONATE, MAGNESIUM OXIDE, CALCIUM PHOSPHATE, SODIUM ASCORBATE, VITAMIN E ACETATE, FERRIC ORTHOPHOSPHATE, NIACINAMIDE, ZINC OXIDE, CALCIUM PANTOTHENATE, MANGANESE SULFATE, PYRIDOXINE HYDROCHLORIDE, THIAMIN MONONITRATE, VITAMIN A PALMITATE, CHROMIUM CHLORIDE, RIBOFLAVIN, BIOTIN, COPPER GLUCONATE, FOLIC ACID, SODIUM MOLYBDATE, SODIUM SELENITE, PHYTONADIONE (VITAMIN K1), POTASSIUM IODIDE, CHOLECALCIFEROL (VITAMIN D3), AND CYANOCOBALAMIN (VITAMIN B12). SWEETENED WITH NUTRITIVE SWEETENERS AND A NONNUTRITIVE SWEETENER. MAY CONTAIN WHEAT . PHENYLKETONURICS: CONTAINS PHENYLALANINE.


#8

One thing she might want to consider eating instead of the slimfast is stawberries!! You can get bags of frozen ones that you can keep for a longer time in the freezer. I love them. Much healthier! Or those smoothie packets you can get at walmart. You just have tk have a packet and put the frozen strawberrier/blueberries/whatever and mix it with yogurt and the powder. Thatd be better and more healthy than a slinfast.


#9

It may be that the medication wouldn't cause near as much problem without the Slimfast. Since the Slimfast is so high in sugar this wouldn't surprise me.

Also, until this is straightened around it makes sense to me that your wife goes to bed earlier on Sat. night so she can get up earlier Sun. morn - after all her husband is getting miserable because of this.


#10

I think your wife needs to inform the Dr of this side effect, and also get some dietary counseling which is covered by most insurance plans. I am a Type II diabetic and had to experiment with a number of meds and also get dietary counseling in order to understand the whole diabetic precess--and I am a nurse. But there was a lot I was not aware of concerning diet.

The nausea needs reported, definitely.


#11

It sounds like there are some things you can do-- making a healthy breakfast conducive to helping a diabetic rather than a "Southern fried" breakfast-- and some things she can do-- change her sleep habits, exercise, and STOP drinking Slimfast shakes for breakfast. Those things are full of sugar. No wonder she is nauseated.


#12

[quote="DaveBj, post:1, topic:320162"]
My wife is a type-2 diabetic. She has just started taking a new medication which must be injected after she gets up and before she eats anything. On Sunday mornings she wants to sleep until an hour before we leave, which gives her just enough time to get ready, including injecting herself, and then she drinks a Slimfast on the way to church.

One of this med's side effects is nausea, and my wife has been getting that in spades. So she's miserable during Mass, sitting there trying not to throw up, and she's not one for hiding it well when she's not comfortable. That makes me miserable because I know she's miserable, and it's making my Sunday Mass experience a completely negative one. When we leave, my back is tied in knots from the tension (I can't blame the pews; I also go to weekday Masses, and I have no back pain after those.).

I have suggested getting up earlier and actually eating some solid food, but I don't know whether or not she will consider getting up earlier to do that. I don't want to start going to separate Masses, but once in a while I would like to have a Mass experience that I didn't have to offer up as personal suffering.

What I need is for someone to give me a quick kick in the zadnitsa and tell me to straighten up. Any volunteers?

[/quote]

Straighten up you selfish man - imagine what your wife is going through!

Did that help?:thumbsup:

Probably not.:shrug:

There's good advice in te other posts though


#13

I used to drink Slimfast in the mornings but stopped because it tied my stomach in knots and made me sick as a dog. And I'm not diabetic! That stuff will tear up a healthy person. I can only imagine what it would do to a diabetic. I don't know if it's any better given your wife's diabetes, but check out Instant Breakfast with her doctor and/or nutritionist. At least you add your own (real) milk to it. My Mom uses it when she's feeling sick from all her cancer meds. Or maybe Ensure as they have one formulated for diabetics.

In other words, it might not be the meds. Especially if she only gets nauseous when she drinks Slimfast. It may be the Slimfast.
Kris


#14

No way I can get down to Alabama, but if you fed-ex that there Zadnitsa figamajig up here to Indy I’ll stomp on it a bit and then send ‘er on back down there to you pretty as ya’ please:D

Seriously, maybe go to a mass or two during the week by yourself now and then.


#15

Here’s an idea from the NFP world. Can you (or she) inject the med as soon as she wakes up? So not after she’s up and done all her morning routine. That will give her a little additional time to feel awake enough to eat something more than a slimfast shake.

If she just can’t face something solid that early, I second the idea of making a healthier shake/smoothie. Even if it is just blended yogurt and fruit, it will be better than a processed shake and enough food to see her through Mass. Then you can have a proper lunch afterward.

I also highly recommend that she talk to her doctor again about her schedule and the timing of her meals (and what type of food she should be eating). It is rare for people to truly be wired as “night owls” and do well on that schedule. Not getting proper sleep can also affect her metabolism.

I’ll be praying for you both.


#16

In the pharmacy section of most grocery and chain stores like Walmart, etc. is usually a section devoted to diabetic foods and drinks that will help maintain a healthy blood sugar by slow releasing of complex carbs. One of these is a much healthier alternative for diabetics than the Slimfast. The most common brand is called Glucerna, but there are others, I'm not promoting just this one. They are expensive, but one can substitute for a meal, and there are snack bars that are good to help prevent dips and spikes in the blood sugar. She might feel better having one of the shakes for breakfast.


#17

I have type two diabetes, but I never had to take shots for it, mine came in pill form. I wanted to stay up late also and sleep until noon.
I went to the nutritionist and was put on the right kind of diet for my weight as well as for my diabetes. I was told that breakfast was the most important meal of the day, and I had to change my daily routine.
Your wife will eventually get tired of the way she feels, and want to know exactly what she needs to eat and do so that the shot won't make her sick. If she is honest with her doctor, lets him know how much she enjoys staying up late, and how she is eating...they will try to work with her and figure out to either change her medicine or her living habits.
She also probably knows how you feel about all this, but is not ready to face it yet.

Does she get this sick feeling on any other day? If she doesn't, it is probably lack of sleep and not so much what she drinks on the way to church. When I stayed up half the night and had to get up early I would be sick to my stomach, and I'm sure if I had drank a lot of sugar it would have made it worse. I hope this helps in some small way. May the love and peace of God be with you both.

I will add both of you to my small, but growing prayer list:thumbsup:


#18

How about trying Saturday evening Mass?


#19

praying for you both!


#20

I would definitely try to ween her off of Slimfast and find a healthy alternative such as a fruit smoothie or possibly a protein shake. Also, "southern-fried" breakfasts aren't good for either of you, so try and make a healthy alternative. It is being considerate of her condition, and you'll appreciate the healthier meals in the long run as well.

As the others have suggested, I would try and go to the Saturday evening Mass whenever possible. I don't know if you have family functions regularly on Saturday nights that impede you from doing so, but I would definitely try.

Consult a doctor about her habits such as sleeping in so late, drinking too much sugar, and staying up most of the night. I would definitely try and confront her first so that she doesn't accuse you of "going behind her back".

Lastly, the best thing to do is not get angry or mad with her or at least show her that you are upset because of what she's doing. She's being counterproductive given her condition, but it doesn't help when you two fight about it, and I'm glad to hear that you haven't been fighting recently.

This is a very tricky subject, but the best thing she can do right now is to consult a doctor about her habits and condition and see where they can go from there. It's bad when you are being affected by this.


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