I’m disappointed with faith.
I converted to Catholicism a few ago and a few years before that I converted to Christianity from agnosticism.
I felt at the time God was working in me, that he changed me and I thought he would always be with me.
I suffered a lot as a child and teenager growing up so I thought God was working in me to be a better person and I had a desire to help others and became a health care worker.
But then I got severely depressed. I’ve had failed relationships. I’ve been mostly unemployed and when I have worked I’ve been injured at work, bullied and suffered stress.
I’m now isolated, unhappy and poor and I feel God is not there at all.
It’s disappointing because I thought I could use my faith to help others yet I’m the one suffering and not a soul has helped me while I’m down. Not even God.
I believe in him but I think God just lets stuff happen and then we die and get judged, and I’m doubting my salvation now because I just feel the furthest from him.
I didn’t know it was going to be like this. I know saints suffered but they had strength and love from God. I have nothing.