I agree with all of the posters in this thread, and especially with the above.
“Before I was born the LORD called me; from my birth he has made mention of my name.” ~Isaiah 49:1
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
13 **For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb. **
14 **I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well. **
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 **your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be. **
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.
19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Before we were born God knew we were to be. Certainly God never meant for us to be accidents of a momentary passion; that is man’s sin. Every life is significant to Him for He died for that life. What a pity that we are to the place where we find babies in trash bins! This verse alone should tell us how very important we are in His plans. We were called, we were named and we were claimed, even before we were born! That’s a wondrous thought and an awesome responsibility. “God created [us] in his own image…male and female he created [us]” (Genesis 1:27). We didn’t come swinging into this world, with no purpose for being.
He has a job for us to do that no one else can do on this earth. “Who knows but that you have come…for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14); “There came a man who was sent from God” (John 1:6). First things first: recognize the Creator and Redeemer, and then life becomes livable and likeable. Otherwise, if we don’t credit God with the miracle of what and why and who we are, then the miracle is that we can live a worthwhile life at all.
Don’t despair – you can get the help you need for your eating disorder and the rest will be OK. It might not be easy, but it will be worth it and you will be so glad you gave your child life!
We are all praying for you. Please contact one of the resources listed by some of the other posters – help is there.