Thanks for your honesty.
Maybe I wasn’t clear enough about my thoughts on this. I once thought that masturbation was extremely trivial, like scratching an itch, that’s it. But since I’ve become a Catholic I’ve had to think about it differently, I had to decide whether I agreed that it was a mortal sin or not for example. At first I didn’t.
Eventually I considered carefully what in fact I was doing and I decided that although the act itself isn’t that awful my accompanying thoughts were not helpful to my attempts to be pious. That throws up hypocrisy as well. I personally think that that is where the evil lies and so I now agree that masturbation, particularly accompanied by viewing pornography is pernicious. Jesus spoke once about a divided house cannot stand and I feel it applies here because there is this incongruence involved and as everyone seeks to remove incongruence due to the discomfort of mental ambiguity there is a danger that someone’s faith would collapse, especially if they are young.
I do agree with you and I am not a paragon of virtue by any means, but there are some underlying dangers which need to be addressed I think. If I’m going to seek reconciliation by telling another man that I’ve masturbated I need to have a good reason! My only good reason would be if I genuinely thought it was a mortal sin and had caused separation from God.
Years ago someone told me or I read that the most common reasons for damnation are sins of the flesh. Personally I try to keep that thought. I’m glad we talked about this because the problem is often not discussed properly in my opinion.