I ask MANY questions if you follow my posting. I LOVE THIS WEBSITE. My main thing is spiritual immaturity. When it comes down it to, if I knew how to avoid certain consequences , I did not care what others thought of me, and if I had money, I would be living a very sinful lifestyle. I DO NOT WANT TO HARM OTHERS. If I would not embarrass my family (especially my father) and if I would not regret if when I was older, I would totally star pornography with no questions asked. I am scared of others judging me. I know how emotionally fragile I am, I could not handle that lifestyle for long.
Most of the time, when I confess my sins it is because I feel guilty if someone would have treated me the same way or I think if today was my last day and I was hit by a car, I know I would go to hell for this.
I am envious when I see others living their lives sinfully in ways I would love to,but I cannot because I am scared of consequences (hell, judgment by others, disapproval of my family).
People say God gives you free-will, but honestly I cannot happily make a choice that I suspect God disapproves of.
Do any others feel similarly?