Sorry, I plead justification on this one. My family and his family are too involved and important to not get invited. We are the oldest and the first in both families.
Together we have more than a 100 cousins. And we’re not talking about that one cousin out in Hawaii that we saw a decade ago, these people are part of our lives.
Even if I cut it to just immediate family members, that is still 23 people, plus two witnesses. And I would live in constant fear of my aunts coming to kill me for not letting them be there. Besides that, I still haven’t found a parish that will witness me, a groom and two witnesses for a cheaper rate. That means I can have 500 people or 5 people for the same price. Ridiculous!
Now, if we invite only family, we come up with a guest list of almost 280.
What about some of our best friends? What about coworkers? Adults only, tack on 150. Kids, tack on 280. And this doesn’t count acquaintances. These are friends, like people we grew up with, graduated from highschool with, see weekly. At least with coworkers we can keep it down to maybe 20-40 people in just our departments.
Fortunately, we have the same friend group and we work for the same company. LOL! Imagine otherwise!
So, yes! I am stressed out! I want a big happy gathering, lots of food and music. There will be tons of kids and everyone knows everyone excepting coworkers. It is going to be a huge bash with big expectations from both sides of the family.
I need a big ceremony site and a big reception site. Those cost $$$ quite a lot of money!
So at times I am downright depressed and sad! But on my wedding day I will be happy and with God’s blessing, the rest of my married life!
All of that being said, I want to point out something I consider very important: the money isn’t really the stressor. I am doing this simply and cost-effectively. It is customary for family members to help. Grandma is a prof. cake maker, friends are catering, my nana is bringing the food, my friend owns a decorating business, etc. I am purchasing my dress on eBay for less than a $100. The reception will be completely casual. The bridesmaids are getting pretty but much reduced prom dresses purchased from a department store ($20ea).
I would say trying to make it simple and not splurge money is what makes it so depressing and stressful!! I would rather dump 30K on this and do it the big huge fancy way, pass it off to a professional planner, KWIM? Of course, I don’t have 30K and if I did, I wouldn’t spend it on a wedding…
Anyways, good luck to the people out there involved in weddings!