Interesting Question asked on "Ask an Apologist". Take a look everyone


#1

Hi all,

What do you guys think about this quesion asked on the “Ask an Apologist” board.

Nelson

danh http://forums.catholic.com/images/statusicon_cad/user_offline.gif vbmenu_register(“postmenu_1192640”, true);
Junior Member
Join Date: December 28, 2005
Posts: 2

http://forums.catholic.com/images/icons/icon1.gif Is a marriage valid if a Catholic couple plans to disregard contraception rules?
A Catholic friend is planning to marry her Catholic boyfriend in a Catholic wedding. She is adamant that after she has some children (not sure yet how many) she will either get a tubal ligation or ask her husband to get a vasectomy. She does not intend to raise the matter with the priest beforehand. Will the marriage be a valid one or is this grounds for an annulment?
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http://forums.catholic.com/images/statusicon_cad/post_old.gif December 28, 2005, 12:03 PM
[left]Michelle Arnold http://forums.catholic.com/images/statusicon_cad/user_offline.gif vbmenu_register(“postmenu_1193400”, true);
Catholic Answers Apologist
Join Date: May 3, 2004
Location: San Diego, CA
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http://forums.catholic.com/images/icons/icon1.gif Re: Is a marriage valid if a Catholic couple plans to disregard contraception rules?
In this case, the issue is not so clear-cut as it would be in the case of someone planning never to have children. Your friend is planning to have children, but is also planning to cut off her openness to life after she has the number of children she wants. Since I am not a canon lawyer, I can only recommend that you call your diocese’s marriage tribunal and ask for an assessment of the situation.

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#2

What is so interesting about this? Seems like a non-event to me.


#3

It seems to me that if both the bride and groom have this attitude that no sacramental marriage will take place, which would be grounds for annulment later on. Of course, both this husband and wife or either one of them may have a change of heart later on. Still, I’d advise this couple to talk to their priest about this before taking vows they do not mean to keep by resolving to commit a mortal sin. They need to understand what the Church teaches and why before they put their souls in danger.


#4

I think Michelle gave an excellent answer. She is not a canon lawyer, and this is basically a canon law question. At the least, the priest who is supposed to marry this couple should be aware of the intentions (maybe the bishop as well), so that he could counsel them on the church teachings, and perhaps even decline to participate if necessary.

I believe Benedict XVI (God bless him) has indicated that it may be a time for the Catholic Church to get “smaller” but more fervent. What good is having, say, 100 million members if the majority of them range from lukewarm to downright hostile on the faith? Members in name only do more harm than good, IMO.


#5

What you fail to look at is the fact that through it all the couple may convert.

Posible oh yes.
I had two children and then my husband and I decided that was all we could afford. I was going to get a tubal ligation. I went for the tests and was scheduled the following day to go in. Well on our way home from the blood work we were in a car accident not serious just enough for me to wake up.
Long story short I was that far away from the church before coming back.
Anything is possible with God and a whole lot of prayer.


#6

[quote=Toni]What you fail to look at is the fact that through it all the couple may convert.

Posible oh yes.
I had two children and then my husband and I decided that was all we could afford. I was going to get a tubal ligation. I went for the tests and was scheduled the following day to go in. Well on our way home from the blood work we were in a car accident not serious just enough for me to wake up.
Long story short I was that far away from the church before coming back.
Anything is possible with God and a whole lot of prayer.
[/quote]

Yes, you are right. But, to deliberately plan to limit children by means of any form of artificial contraception before even getting married is a very grave sin. And being in a state of mortal sin is hardly a good beginning for any marriage. This young couple really needs to understand what they are doing and why they have to be open to life within their marriage.


#7

However, when in spite of all efforts, engaged couples show that they reject explicitly and formally what the Church intends to do when the marriage of baptized persons is celebrated, the pastor of souls cannot admit them to the celebration of marriage. In spite of his reluctance to do so, he has the duty to take note of the situation and to make it clear to those concerned that, in these circumstances, it is not the Church that is placing an obstacle in the way of the celebration that they are asking for, but themselves. Pope John Paul II, Familiarius Consortio


#8

I would say that the situation leaves the validity of the Marriage questionable. It would however hinge more on deception and hiding of facts and intent then strictly on the issue of limiting the number of children. I know of cases where the validity was called into question when it was found that a couple intended to have one and only one child and intended this from the beginning.


#9

I may be a little too loyal and a little too Jersey for my own good. That said, I have learned great deal from Michelle Arnold this year. (And you better believe I am grateful for it!) The issues raised in this thread notwithstanding, Michelle is doing the work of the angels every day.


#10

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