Interfaith dating/marriage


#1

i know, in general, the church encourages us to date and marry within our own faith but dispensations can be given.

i definitely understand the difficulties that come along with this and personally, i don’t think it’s something i would ever do. everyone thinks I’m weird because of that though. my family, even many of my other catholic friends or acquaintances. but my faith is the most important thing to me, if the person I’m marrying doesn’t share it, what’s left really?

on the other hand, I’ve read many conversion stories where it was precisely the marriage which helped them to convert. not that they simply did to get married but the constant exposure and good modeling from the other spouse

so i don’t know, in some situations, i guess it can be worked out

so, in which types of scenarios does the church give permission to do this? what would be a legitimate reason?

what do you think?


#2

It depends on the couple. Dispensations are not offered based on a “If a, then B but not C” cheat sheet. It depends on the people involved.

Many people think it’s silly to worry about interfaith marriages because they think faith overall is silly, or at least the role faith plays in marriage. Interestingly, in all the mixed marriages I know of (personally, not on CAF), the Catholic spouse is lapsed.


#3

Marry a Catholic if you can, it’s just easier. Couples place a big emphasis on liking the same foods, the same places to live, raising kids a certain way, but yet, when it comes to their souls…they’re not so picky.

Save yourself a lot of heartache. Either marry a Catholic or marry someone who truly is not threatened by your faith, or will not change their mind about you practicing your faith and raising children in it.

In the end, we fall in love with who we fall in love with. Hopefully you will be fortunate and find a good, practicing Catholic young man someday.

If you fall in love with someone of another faith. be sure he knows your feelings about your faith. Clearly. And is OK with it. Marriage is wonderful and often, difficult. your faith should not be something to have a lot of drama about. It should be the one area where the both of you find peace.


#4

I didn’t marry a Catholic, my husband is an Agnostic Presbyterian sort. He just doesn’t care about any of it. He is ok with me raising our kids Catholic. Since I have been married, I have taken my faith more seriously, and had a reversion. It is a bit baffling to him I think. It sucks not too be able to share a MAJOR part of my life with him. He does come to mass with me on occasion and is not judgemental. I pray for him and for our marriage. The tricky thing, is the family planning part. You know? That is a big hurdle. It would have been easier if he was Catholic but it would have been harder if he was practicing another faith, and was very passionate about it, or anti catholic.


#5

I agree,

though for some reason, I’m considered the weird one. oh well…

I don’t feel particularly called to marriage anyways, but who knows. need to work on this whole vocation discernment thing

though, i must say, strong, practicing, catholic, young men seem to be quite a rare breed these days


#6

HA! Not if you read CAF! Los Lonely Boyz are EVERYWHERE> :smiley:


#7

hmm, guess i haven’t noticed that particular aspect of CAF yet. lol

though I’d really rather not do the whole online long distance thing.


#8

That is true, but there are also stories where the Catholic spouse leaves the faith (or, at least, becomes very lax) because of the constant exposure to and poor modeling of the other spouse.


#9

If your Catholic faith is important to you, then you want to make absolutely sure that your non-Catholic spouse has no problems at all with you openly practicing your faith and will definitely be fine with children being brought up in the faith.
Also, you should get married in the Church after doing marriage prep so you both understand and the Catholic meaning of Holy Matrimony. I would see resistance to any of these things as a serious red flag.


#10

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