I need prayers for my anger, anguish, anxiety, and depression. I failed to get a job that I wanted: I have 5 years of experience and a Bachelor of Science degree. Who do they decide to hire? A person straight out of college with no scientific working experience. I have been out of school for more than a year now.
I was told my interviewing skills were superb, my working background excellent, and that I needed no improvement with how I interviewed. But that sends a message to me that I’m just “not good enough,” but I’m not over-qualified. I keep telling myself, why did I not get this position? What am I missing? What am I doing wrong? Why must I continue to suffer? All I want is a permanent position with a company. I feel like a failure. All my life I have felt like a failure and been told by others that I can do better…I’m trying the best I can.
The lack of employment is emotionally and mentally draining on me. I am trying hard to act like normal at work but sometimes I just want to breakdown. Contract work is manipulative. I feel like no one cares about my job situations or the pressure I’m under. Now I feel like I’ll be working “full-time” just to start looking for a permanent job somewhere else.
I’m trying so hard not to hate or feel jealous, but the emotions keep overriding me. I want to just take a “long walk” as I have contemplated before, but I know I can’t because I have hundreds of dollars worth of loan payments I need to make each month.
It’s hard to realize, but we want to pretend that young people don’t feel this way with regards to jobs or employment. It is really hard on me, I truly feel like I really understand now how the unemployed or lacking-employed feel.
Please pray for me. I need all the prayers I can get to stop feeling this way.