Is dating/looking for a wife putting yourself in occasion of sin?


#1

I believe Paul says it's better to marry than to burn with passion and desire.

However, how does one go about looking for a wife or to date with the intention of potential marriage at some point, without subjecting themselves to the occasion of sin (which in itself is a sin) ?

I have seen some people argue that this occasion of sin (sin) is acceptable because it leads to a greater good (marriage). On the other hand though, I am fully aware that the Church teaches that the ends never justify the means.

What do I make of this?


#2

First of all, you need to meat a woman in order to get married. So what is the ideal place to do so? In the Church, after Mass. But how likely is it? Well, some have done it. But after that you have no choice, you need to date this woman in order to learn what she is like, do you two really fit together, are you on the same wavelength. You really can not walk up to a woman and say: "I would like to marry you. How about a month from now, same place, ten a'clock sharp?" No, no, and no. The only way you will find out if she loves you, do you like her after a while, are you ready to spend the rest of your life with her, is to date. You may be right, it could go out off hands, but that is a risk you must take, and she will also do so. What would be a "safe" place to meet and get knowing a bit of her, and let her know more about you? Truth? There are no fail-safe place to do so.

And you may meet her in other places, she may not even be Catholic. Love has it's way to get a mind of it's own, and it is most unlikely that you meet her in a Catholic Church. And no matter where you find her, you simply must take the risk because dating is the only way to get somewhere with this thing. It is worth mentioning that if you are out "hunting" for a bride you will never find one. In time you will find someone, and you only have one choice, enough faith to withstand temptations that will occur. Yes, the element of a occasion of a sin is present, but you seem to be a good Catholic because you are asking this question, so I think you have what it takes to not sin while dating, beacuse dating is really a "must".


#3

Sometimes we as Catholics or Christians in General ...
We Sometimes do to much navel Gazing ... maybe we should relax a little and let go a little
..... we shouldn't Judge ourselves to much... as to weather we are committing a sin..
by what we should or should not do or say.. how else are we to learn about ourselves or others ...... go out and have a good time and find the love of your life....
God Wont let you go even if you let go first.


#4

[quote="TheHolyGhost, post:1, topic:334478"]

I believe Paul says it's better to marry than to burn with passion and desire.

However, how does one go about looking for a wife or to date with the intention of potential marriage at some point, without subjecting themselves to the occasion of sin (which in itself is a sin) ?

I have seen some people argue that this occasion of sin (sin) is acceptable because it leads to a greater good (marriage). On the other hand though, I am fully aware that the Church teaches that the ends never justify the means.

What do I make of this?

[/quote]

If dating might be an occasion of sin, arguably, so is any other necessary human interaction. How do you control yourself when you work or go to the bank?

If you continue to struggle over questions like these, you should probably consult your pastor for spiritual guidance.


#5

[quote="Bezant, post:4, topic:334478"]
If dating might be an occasion of sin, arguably, so is any other necessary human interaction. How do you control yourself when you work

[/quote]

Sinfully. The way women interact here flirtaciously and with sexual innuendos sometimes and the way they dress, its hard to.not eventually fall into lustful thoughts.

If I were to date an attractive woman and she came onto me, I dont think I would be able to say no.


#6

[quote="TheHolyGhost, post:5, topic:334478"]
Sinfully. The way women interact here flirtaciously and with sexual innuendos sometimes and the way they dress, its hard to.not eventually fall into lustful thoughts.

[/quote]

Talk to your priest and pray for better restraint.

If I were to date an attractive woman and she came onto me, I dont think I would be able to say no.

Sexually? If so, discuss with a priest.


#7

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