Is dying the only way I’m going to be able to get beyond masturbation? I’m not sure that it’s not. I can’t even begin to imagine living the rest of my life under such a long, long shadow.
The only shadow you live under my friend, is the shadow of the Cross. You should rejoice in this, because it is The Lord that goes before you - hence the shadow.
Embrace Him. He has already embraced you.
You can always turn to Joseph for help, and perhaps even wear his cord. It’s a bit of an old fashion devotion, but the Cord or Cinture of St. Joseph may just help you and you can make one yourself. Saints throughout the ages of used cords to “gird” themselves to help with chasity.
If anything, the thin cord around your waist under your clothing may just be the physical warning you need to stop yourself, while the prayers of the guardian of virgins strengthens you.
And remember, slipping up isn’t failure if you continue to try.
Maybe you could try praying the Irresistible Novena of Rosaries that’s 27 days in petition, and 27 days in thanksgiving (whether or not the request has been granted.) I know it’s a lot… but if you pray the Rosary anyways, you could turn it into a novena. And start every day with prayer. Remember the devil will try to get you back into sin. So be very careful and avoid occasions of temptation.
Some antidepressants, like Paxil and Lexapro, can relieve the sex drive significantly. I’m on Paxil and it works great. The only problem is increase in food appetite.