This is my first post. I've only been a strong practicing catholic for 3 years, although I was born and raised catholic. I believe God may be calling me to either the single life or religious life. I'm a 33 year old male who has never had a true girlfriend. One relationship did last a month, but come to find out, this girl was still in love with her ex and was using me to get over him. And the past few attempts at meeting a girl and trying to date her seems like God has put a roadblock between them. It always ends up never working out, and it's not because I didn't do my part of building a connection, but for some unforeseen reason, it just doesn't work out.
For example, this girl I tried to date, our phone conversation got disconnected 3 times consecutively, and after I tried to call her back, she didn't return the call (she was probably frustrated). This girl is catholic by the way.
This other girl I met at a catholic young adult event, we exchanged numbers after conversing for awhile, I then invited her to a group that I attend, and we had a great conversation there, she hugged me and invited me to go hiking with her. I called her 4 days later and she never returned my call, I even followed up wit her.
This other girl I have known for 3 years, we were just acquaintances, only really facebook friends, I was at an event she invited me to, and I tried to connect with her, and I ended up getting laryngitis, so I wasn't able to connect with her.
Just recently, a girl who I was attempting to connect with, it turns out that she is moving to Missouri in a week, so not enough time to build a connection.
There are more examples than this, but these are all catholic girls, and it seems that God is always sabotaging me attempts to meet and connect with women.
I do love God so much, and I could see myself serving him and giving him my life fully, but at the same time, I have natural sexual desires and a need to be with a woman. I haven't really thought about having children, because I first need to have a girlfriend before I can even think about that.
I don't feel of this world, like money, power etc, worldly things don't appeal to me. I feel like an outsider from the world. I feel detached from the world. Movies that I used to love, I feel like I don't even want to watch them!!! This American culture disgusts me, with all of the bad music and movies(I'm generalizing her). I have such a strong sense of conscientiousness, where I know right from wrong, and I view the world through a catholic prism. The past few weeks, I have been crying my eyes out a few times because I love God so much and I was thanking him for everything he has done for me.
Do you believe I have a religious vocation, or I'm just called to be single?