Hello everyone, I’d like to ask everyone for your prayers for peace of mind and heart.
Today is my 17th wedding anniversary. I met my husband in the Air Force back in 1993, we were married in 1996. we were married by a judge in a civil ceremony with the intent of having a church wedding, however as soon as I said yes the chruch wedding was thrown to the side. During the last 10-12 yrs (lost track) we live in the same household but have very separate lives. The Lord blessed me with 3 boys 2 biological & one from his previous marriage. We have not had any intimacy or friendrship for over 12 yrs. I respect him as the father of my children & by the grace of God don’t have any ill will towards him. We are civil towards each other but that is it. I spoke to my priest and I still can’t partake in taking the eucharist, the deacon recommnds I speak to our new priest. I currently feel drained and cheated. I don’t really believe he ever really loved me. I truly feel like he drains me physically & emotionally when i`m around him. I also feel lonely and like "ve wasted away, with the exception of the Lords blessing with my kids. So please pray for me I need emotional,physical & spiritual help.
So is God present in a marriage that is not performed with the blessing of the church?