[quote="wworld, post:1, topic:225818"]
I've read somewhere online (albeit not a very trustworthy one...) that you must tell your neighbor that they should repent for their sin if it was a mortal sin or you will be in a state of mortal sin.
Now, obviously, I don't want to be in a state of mortal sin, so I'm asking this question. :)
Anyways, is this claim correct? Because wouldn't that be considered judging somebody? (forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=10706) And I also remember reading somewhere that it's a sin to forget that everyone is responsible for their own sins.
So... Yes, I'm very confused. Thanks in advance! :D
Admonishing the sinner is a work of mercy. That said, being judgmental is a sin. Its important to discern between when we're motivated to correct someone out of self-righteousness and when saying something is truly out of charity and mercy.
Moreover, we can only know if a sin is grave and thus potentially mortal. We cannot judge the hearts of individuals. We need to acknowledge that we may not actually have the best understanding of sin itself. We can suffer from our own scrupulocities and confusions about what the faith teaches.
Meanwhile it is tricky. Some doors are slammed tight. People aren't receptive, they already know what the Church teaches and hammering them on the head with it only seals the door more. As such, its important for us to look for open doors and windows and to gently approach individuals with the truth. Ultimately then it is up to them to open the door further. Sometimes people will still reject the truth and then you have to leave it as that. To do anymore at that point is a bit self righteous.
Its not always clear. When my brother-in-law and I became friends, he was just coming back to the faith but was still progressive. His parents were divorced. His Dad had remarried multiple times and his mom was in a lesbian relationship. He had several friends who had had abortions. Overall the people he loved were people he didn't want to make feel condemned and hearing that "Well the Church teaches the truth and she either has authority or she doesn't" didn't sit well with him. He got angry at me many times, and thankfully many times I shut up and just prayed for him. But he was still curious and would ask me questions and then get angry at me...and then change his mind realizing that the Church was right. I know its hard for him. He still loves his parents and now has to deal with others accusing him as being a homophobe and potentially a terrible son. We all try to assure him that he knows what is in his heart and it is nothing but love for his mother. So while he was loud about complaining about such information, he was an open door and I saw him make a 180 in his life. Little did I know that he and my sister would end up married.
Then there was the surprise. I had a friend who I met at daily Mass. She went to confession pretty regularly and was constantly talking about St. Faustina. Every once in awhile she'd get confused about whether or not she could receive the Eucharist in a state of mortal sin, and little things like chewing gum at Mass. She also was confused a bit about dating and marriage and following the precepts of the Church. it took me awhile to realize that she held St. Faustina as a higher authority than the magistrium of the Church, and that she was easily misguided to believing she had met some real mystics at daily Mass who she thought had a direct connection to God even though they admitted they didn't agree with the bishops on everything. Overall, she was more superstitutious than religious and I wasn't aware of that. Eventually she got mad at me for pointing things out to her. Then a priest upset her in the confessional and from then on she pretty much left.
So ultimately its not simply "Is this person going to Mass?" regularly that determines if the door is opened or closed. It really is more about how open the person is to listening and whether or not they are seeking the truth. A person who appears to be more outside the Church may be closer to entering and open to God's grace and truth than a person who appears to be very much inside the Church.