Prior to my reversion to my Catholic roots… I lived quite the pre-conversion St. Agustine life and there are some things that I would like to keep to myself because I consider it private and part of my intimate, personal road to Christian maturity and I’ve already confessed it SEVERAL TIMES OVER. I would rather just not share it and openly talk about it and instead because I hate myself for doing what I did, but I have truly grown in the process that much I can tell you. It was such a dark and deplorable part of my past that when I think about it I just get even more angry with myself. I just want to leave all the stuff I did behind bury it in the past since I am a new man in Christ… There are somethings that I would rather not talk about with my friends or my parents but want to keep to myself. Do I still have that right to personal privacy?
Well, the benchmark is whether the people you’re thinking about telling have a right to the information. Just put yourself in their shoes and ask yourself whether you would feel like you had a right to know this jnformation about someone.
If you DO decide to keep quiet, it’s best to deflect questions (if any) with a general statement like ‘I’ve done stuff that I’m not proud of, and I’m not prepared to talk
about it’. That should stop them from repeating the question.
And If I prefer to keep it just between me and God, is that a sin? Like what I mean is that do I have to out myself to everyone? If it really is “past is past”, why do I have to tell people? Since I technically repented.
I thought I made it clear - you don’t have to tell anyone (except your priest in confession) a thing unless they have a right to the information - eg if it directly affects them in some important way. Of course that doesn’t mean you can necessarily lie, but you can tell people you’re not prepared to talk about something of you aren’t.
Apologies if I was unclear.
I might not be understanding something, but past sins only need to be confessed once. (Though if you commit them again, then by all means confess them again.)
Part of your spiritual growth will lead you to despise your sins, but just as Jesus so loves you, you must learn to love you too. Talk to your confessor about this. :o
I never talk to my family about my sins (unless it’s speeding or banal stuff). Instead I focus on virtues with them. If your friends and family really want to know about your past, tell them you are moving forward with the help of a priest.
If they want to help you become a better person, then they will
focus on emphasizing the good things you should do,
not focusing on the bad things you shouldn’t have done.
Except for a priest in confession, you don’t have to tell anybody about any sins of your past, present, future, or alternative realities! It is not a sin to not tell people about your past sins. Talk to you priest for more advice on this subject if you’re still uncertain.
Remember, God is on your side, my friend!
absolutely that is why confession is confidential and private
unless you have something that requires apology and reconciliation with someone you hurt, and that is part of your own penance and healing, there is no requirement for anyone else to know any of this. I for one wonder why the question should ever come up, but I am sure that is a generational thing, as that private level of sharing was just not done, even as a matter of etiquette, in my day.
Well, there ARE times when you are required to speak up. One being if you are required to give evidence in court, which is one situation where you are not permitted to conceal anything relevant that you might know. The fact you’ve confessed doesn’t let you off the hook.
And, as one example, most spouses would agree that they have a right to know if their spouse has been unfaithful. Things like that.