I’m a straight guy, but I have the tendency to look up these pictures online. I don’t lust over them. I don’t get aroused when I look at them. In my head, I’ll think like, “DAYUM! Those muscles! The arms, the abs! Wish I got something like that!” When I walk past attractive guys, I take a few glances at their hair, the contour of their shirts, their style and fashion, their voice and how they talk, how they walk. I have a competitive and insecure nature, and am not a very attractive looking person, and I think that is why I do this. I do this mindlessly, but when I realize I am doing this, I stop and pray. Whenever this happens, am I committing any sin aside from a venial “I-can’t-help-it” jealousy over the person I glanced at?
I guess it would depend. If you look at guys as God’s fine workmanship and would wish you were more like them, it might be OK, but I still would be careful about it as there seems to be a strong attraction there. Your best bet would to ask your priest about it. I am wondering if you have an attraction to girls or women? If not I would question the “straight guy” aspect. Whatever the case you would still be a child of Cod-just don’t sin.
I think Women do this more than Guys do.
I think that as long as you apologize for not paying attention to where you are walking, you are not sinning…
Yes, I do have heterosexual attraction. I do not have a girlfriend, but that was mainly because I move locations a lot, and do not have an opportunity to develop a relationship. But yes, I do have a strong attraction to women. My SSA, if you want to call it that, has decreased over time. I used to feel intensely jealous over attractive guys, and look down on myself, and ask myself why I am so ugly. But I have increased my confidence, and my feelings toward men have significantly decreased over the years.
Please discuss this with your Confessor/spiritual director.
Maybe a venial sin if you’re really coveting something God hasn’t chosen to give you. If, out of jealousy, you’re wishing the person suffers serious harm because of their gifts then you might be verging on grave sin. Based on what you’re saying, you’re going about this the right way. You’re growing in virtue, and that’s great.
I may be able to speak with my vocation director before I do with my spiritual director. Should I tell him too?
Jesus said; “He who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
St Paul spoke about the human body, “The less honourable members of the human body are given more respect, and the most honourable parts of the human body given less respect.” He was saying that people cover up what is not modest to be shown in public.
Scandal is something that causes others to sin.
Jesus said of those who cause others to sin (and this may be by dressing immodestly) “Woe to you if you should cause any of these little ones to fall, it would he better if you had a millstone tied around your neck and be cast into the depths of the sea.” Jesus said this about those who cause others to fall.
Dressing immodestly is a sin
Looking at uncharted things that cause you to “look at a man lustfully” Jesus has said that is adultery in the heart.
Accidently is not a sin, and temptation is not a sin, deliberate thoughts and actions are
I don’t think it’s a sin at all. If a man is wearing something you find attractive, then it gives you an idea of what you can add to your wardrobe. People can say all they want about how it’s what’s inside a person that really counts–and I agree–however, the world does judge a book by its cover.
And in terms of looking at his physique, are all those men who watch each other in the gym committing sins? All those guys who are in the audience at bodybuilding competitions? I don’t think so. It’s either a competitive thing or it’s hero worship.
I have my own personal favorite, and I wish I had his physique. And I’m married and don’t have a scintilla of SSA in me.
Stop stressing about it.
Does the artist sin because he looks upon a fine specimen of humanity and depicts that person?
Does the botanist sin because he comprehends the beauty in a lily?
I would only advise that you don’t give the impression to others that you’re something that you’re not. Some of the specimens of human perfection (as you see it) may observe you looking and perceive something other than intellectual and artistic interest. Sadly, some people are quite defensive about such things and, despite their obvious attentiveness to their appearance, feel threatened or uncomfortable if they perceive interest from another person of the same gender. You may know you’re not looking at anyone in a sexual fashion, but they may not.
You are quite within your rights to perceive beauty though. It sounds like you have an artist’s outlook on the world. Just let go of your insecurity about it.
I think your going a bit overboard on a couple issues,
Perhaps you might have an Ego problem which is perfectly normal for a young guy,
Just do me a Favor,and think deeply about the next few words you read,
Look not on your sins but on the Faith of your Church …
There are things greater than what you see in the mirror,
Be Humble in all you do,
Enjoy your life and give thanks in all you have &Do