So, I know that in confession we are forgiven for everything, provided we have the firm resolution to not sin again and we don’t intentionally withhold confessing a sin. However, I also know we have a duty to make reparations whenever possible.
Way back in grade school, and this was some 20 years ago now, I wound up being, well, kind of a bully. It wasn’t how I was raised, and I wasn’t always that way, but it was an effort to be “cool,” get in good with the popular kids. It didn’t really last (what goes around comes around). By high school I was already a different person. Of course, I’m an even more different person now, but I guess that goes with growing older, huh? I don’t know what I really knew about mortal and venial sin at the time - I was so young, and lacking a full understanding of that, it probably wasn’t mortal. Intellectually, I know that. Doesn’t mean it wasn’t wrong though.
As the years passed, I began more fully participating in my faith, which of course meant regular confessions (thankfully!). Honestly, I didn’t always think about my wrongdoing in my grade school years; it was long ago forgiven, though I finally did realize I should mention it in confession, which I did.
Anyway, I’m not posting this out of a fear of still being in sin. Whatever was there was taken care of a long time ago. However, now I’m focusing on the reparations. So, I found a few people on Facebook I felt I had been wrong towards way back when, and sent them an apology. I didn’t go into extreme detail, just said that I was wrong and that I was sorry for being unkind to them so long ago. I haven’t heard back from a few of them yet, though one guy (who I bullied, and later, he bullied me) was cool; he understood we were just kids, we talked for a bit, and it was nice. We actually became FB friends.
However, there was one girl I apologized to that, while I wasn’t her main focus (a few of the other guys were apparently REALLY awful to her), did bear some anger towards me. She brought up some things that I honestly don’t remember - though I don’t doubt her recollection. All I could do was apologize again and tell her I’m not who I once was. I’m not sure how helpful that can be, but I felt it was something I had to do.
But now I’m wondering: Should I have said anything to anyone at all? After 20 years? We were such young kids! I didn’t realize until after this girl’s message that I could be digging up some old, painful memories. Of course that was never my intention!
So, my question is: Is it ever wrong to apologize? To attempt to make reparations? IS there ever a point where something in the past should just be left there?