Is it possible for my mom to become catholic? i need help


#1

She is in her 4th marraige as a protestant. None of the previous ones were annulled. She has expressed that God is leading her home. Also her current husband will become Catholic too. He has been married 3 times now, none are annulled. Almost all of there previious marraiges were terrible. Please i dont know what to tell her. Please help me. Will her past affect her now? She is baptized. Also she has 2 children (me being one of them from her third marraige.


#2

Tell your mom not to be afraid of the annullment process. She must talk to a priest and begin work on this.

My son received an annullment. The process was so healing. He had to face himself and the mistakes he made but he learned a lot about himself. The annulment document was so kind and so understanding. He did not marry the catholic girl that he was in love with at the time but he never regretted having gone through that.


#3

She has to have 3 marraiges annulled??? :open_mouth:


#4

Correct. She needs to see a priest as soon as possible and tell him everything.


#5

Does her 3 previous husbands need to be involved. By the way she never intended to have children until the third marriage if that makes any difference. How long will this take!?!?!?


#6

There is no way to know until she talks to the priest. Only he can guide her through the process. She may need to meet with someone in the Diocese tribunal, since her situation is difficult. None of us can tell you or her anything about what will happen since we don’t have the power.

Anyway, in order to become a Catholic, both she and her husband will need to take classes and that process can take a year (sometimes more).


#7

Yes that may mean something. However I assure you the process is just not that intimidating. Go for it. Seriously. What have you got to loose?

It sounds like your mother may indeed have a case for annulment of the marriages. However, it is best to find out from a priest.


#8

These are auestions that you need to take to the priest or to the person to whom the priest directs you (often someone other than the pastor takes care of the initial aspects of anullments).

Whoever your mother talks with will be able to answer her questions, and will know what information they need to ask about, but better information will come from those people than us anonymous non-experts online :wink:


#9

They have to do what everyone else does: go through RCIA and talk to the Pastor. You can only take them so far. It’s like being a doctor and treating your own family, you can be objective. They need to walk this part of the path on their own.


#10

Every situation is different. This board can only encourage you and your mother to have faith and talk with the priest. The people on this board can not know the answers you ask.

I know you are worrying, but just as us parents sometimes have to let go of our children and let our children find their way, children also have to let go and let their parents find the path that they need to take.

Keep praying for God’s help and be patient.


#11

Just as a bit of encouragement…
If all of the marriages were outside of the Church…this could speed up the process…I’m terrible at knowing what the different types of annulments there are - but some types are more easily and quickly handled.

Like the others are saying - have her talk to a priest.

God bless your mom and step-dad for wanting to come home and bless you for your desire to help smooth the way. Assure them that God - and you - will be with them the whole way.

Maybe start a prayer thread for this.

Peace
James


#12

As James and others have said. This is an opportunity for your mother to take care of and deal with her past. It’s a blessing that she will have the opportunity to undergo. She and her current husband must make an appointment with the pastor of the church at which she is attending RCIA. He will guide them. He will refer them to the Tribunal of the diocese who will work with them on dealing with the marriages. This will take some time, but as others have told you, it is well worth it. Pray for your mother and your stepfather, and encourage them in this brave step they are taking. God bless you and God bless them.


#13

It may be possible but it will not be easy as there are two parties involved, each with numerous previous marriages which would need to be annulled before their marriage could be recognised.

Is your mother prepared for the fact that she might not get the required annulments? Is her current husband prepared for the fact that he might not?

Are they both sufficiently committed to joining the Church that they are prepared to live as brother and sister while the previous marriages are being investigated? And to do so permanently in the event that either is found to have a previous valid marriage?

These are serious concerns.


#14

He also has 2 previous marriages…thr first wife died (if that makes a difference) and the second ond tried to kill him…could she become catholic and him not?


#15

All of this MUST be brought before a priest and the Diocese tribunal in charge of annulments. We can’t tell you anything specific. Just please, tell her to go see a priest as soon as possible! No one will keep her away from the Church but she does have some challenges to be faced, as does her current husband. They need to go see the priest together and from then on, there will be a lot of sorting to do.


#16

I’m glad someone brought up the “live as brother and sister” path. Though it is difficult, it is a possibility for a couple who feel their call to communion with the church established by Christ is stronger than their desire for each other (at least until such a time as the required annulments are granted or they are widowed).

The number of children is not a factor in the process (though intent at time of marriage to not have children is a factor).

It sounds like there are a total of-] 5 /-] 4 (I just saw that one former spouse has since died) marriages to be investigated (your mom’s and your stepdad’s). I will pray for their perseverence.


#17

Marriage is dissolved on the death of one of the spouses, so he only need concern himself with the second marriage. Without knowing more it is impossible to say. If it could be established that his ex was mentally ill at the time of the wedding ceremony, to the extent that she could not properly understand or consent to the vows, for example, the marriage would be invalid.

She could become Catholic without him, yes, but even so she would not be able to continue to live with him as man and wife if he has a previous valid marriage. Such would be the sin of adultery.

This clearly is a matter that needs an urgent referral to her priest and the Diocesan Marriage Tribunal.


#18

=MaeganFlinchum1;10267156]She is in her 4th marraige as a protestant. None of the previous ones were annulled. She has expressed that God is leading her home. Also her current husband will become Catholic too. He has been married 3 times now, none are annulled. Almost all of there previious marraiges were terrible. Please i dont know what to tell her. Please help me. Will her past affect her now? She is baptized. Also she has 2 children (me being one of them from her third marraige.

TALK to GOD’s chosen expert; your parish priest WITH YOUR mom and her husband.

There are many complicated issues involved. Avoid the run around and get the answers you seek.:slight_smile:

I’ll pray for all of you.

pat/PJM


#19

i don’t mean to confuse, but would not the second and third marriages be invalid due to the first and thus not really be considered marriages at all.:confused:


#20

Believe it or not this can all be untangled and the way made clear for your Mom and step-Dad to become Catholic. The parish priest where she takes RCIA will help her in the process.


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